Switch Mode

Chapter 36: Anomalous Time 02


Earlier, Yu Bai had devoted all his attention to spinning a tale to fool the police, so he hadn’t grasped at all what Xie Wufang meant by “pain.” A look of complete bewilderment crossed his face.

Only when he followed Xie Wufang’s gaze did he realize it was about the spot where Officer Xiao Li had grabbed him earlier.

“Here?” Yu Bai said. “That doesn’t hurt anymore. Xiao Li didn’t grab that hard—my skin just turns red easily.”

The non-human actually understood the concept of pain.

He even cared about a human.

So why had he shown no reaction at all to Zhang Yunjiang’s “revival”?

Yu Bai marveled inwardly for a moment, but his attention quickly shifted back to the very much alive Zhang Yunjiang standing right in front of him.

Even though he knew this wasn’t the same timespace as the real world, that uncanny feeling of witnessing someone return from the dead lingered in his heart.

The four reasons Yuan Yuxing had listed to test the Doom Orb’s erratic behavior lay quietly on the white sheet of paper in his hand.

Instinctively, Yu Bai folded the paper in his grasp to keep the old man beside him from seeing it.

“We’re fine,” he assured Zhang Yunjiang. “We just had a little mishap a moment ago, but it’s all sorted now.”

After responding to Zhang Yunjiang’s concern, Yu Bai hesitated before asking, “Uncle Zhang, could I ask you something?”

Zhang Yunjiang’s expression softened at the question, his tone kindly. “Sure, what is it? Go ahead!”

Yu Bai asked, “Do you have any… wishes?”

The idea of “unfinished business” had first been trotted out by those turtle bastard relatives who only cared about Zhang Yunjiang’s inheritance. Yuan Yuxing and Yan Jing had conveniently borrowed it as one explanation for the Doom Orb’s antics.

But Yu Bai was the only one who suspected it might actually be the right answer.

From the bizarre effects the non-human neighbor had caused among the humans around him, Yu Bai had deduced that Xie Wufang’s powers included granting wishes—though Xie himself was unaware of it.

The Doom Orb was a gift from Xie Wufang, so it made sense if it carried the same property.

Moreover, Yu Bai recalled Yan Jing saying the Doom Orb felt oddly familiar to him, even suggesting they could “adopt it out” to him.

At the time, he’d thought Yan Jing was joking. Now, it seemed he hadn’t been.

Aside from Doctor Chen, whom he had to see at every reset, Yan Jing was the human Yu Bai had encountered most often in those looping timespaces. After all, he was his best friend from childhood, and Yu Bai frequently dragged the off-duty Yan Jing along for mischief during the loops—like going to meet a forger for fake IDs.

The Doom Orb contained precisely those timespaces.

Which meant that in the real world, the Doom Orb should have some resonance with people Yu Bai had crossed paths with in the loops.

At the very least, Yan Jing—who appeared most frequently in them—had sensed something.

If that resonance was mutual, then Yu Bai’s chance encounter with Zhang Yunjiang and Yuan Yuxing at the funeral parlor might have triggered some power in the Doom Orb. It had kept the former from being cremated and restored the latter to youth.

Based on the clues he had, that was the best guess Yu Bai could make for now.

And the most direct way to learn someone’s wish was, of course, to ask them straight out.

Zhang Yunjiang paused at the question. His arms, calmly crossed over his chest, dropped unconsciously, and a hesitant look crossed his face.

Seeing this, Yu Bai grew serious, holding his breath in anticipation of the answer.

Then he watched as the other man clenched his fists nervously, took a deep breath, and broke into a smile that mixed anxiety with hope.

“I do have one wish,” Old Man Zhang said.

He glanced a bit sheepishly at Xie Wufang, who stood beside Yu Bai.

“It’s… could this blue-eyed young comrade teach me and Old Yuan how to play Go?”

He added in a rambling explanation, “I know you two must have had a scare just now, so it’s probably bad timing. But you suddenly asked about my wishes…”

“…”

Yu Bai, full of eager anticipation, nearly choked. “That doesn’t count!” he blurted reflexively.

Zhang Yunjiang looked puzzled. “Huh? Why not?”

Because in the real world, there was no such thing as Xie Wufang and Yuan Yuxing playing Go in the park. This couldn’t possibly be that Zhang Yunjiang’s dying wish.

Yu Bai couldn’t explain the real reason, so he said, almost petulantly, “Uncle Zhang, pick a different wish—one that doesn’t involve him.”

As he spoke, his gaze swept over the blue-eyed young comrade, catching a flicker of confusion and bewilderment in those eyes.

The ever-curious non-human seemed to sense it wasn’t the right moment, so he held back from voicing his questions.

Good. Xie Wufang had no memories from the original timespace here.

Yu Bai didn’t really want him knowing how he’d lured him out today.

…Even if it had just been one enthusiastic, upbeat scam call.

Steeling himself, Yu Bai leaned in and whispered, “I’ll explain later.”

The man beside him murmured softly, “Okay.”

Zhang Yunjiang frowned in confusion, pondering aloud. “It comes with conditions… What kind of wish could that be?”

The kind that lingered in one’s heart even on one’s deathbed, forever unfulfilled.

Commonly known as a final wish.

But Yu Bai couldn’t put it that way to the Zhang Yunjiang before him. He racked his brain for a gentler way to describe it.

“It’s something really important to you, but tough to achieve anytime soon. Something you keep hoping will come true one day.”

Zhang Yunjiang listened intently, nodding thoughtfully. “Oh! That kind… Yeah, I’ve got one.”

Yu Bai watched him expectantly. “What is it?”

“World peace.”

“…” Yu Bai’s mind blanked for a few seconds. He blurted, “What?!”

Zhang Yunjiang repeated, “World peace! What’s wrong? Don’t you wish for that too? Along with a unified homeland and peace and prosperity for the nation—”

Yu Bai replied a touch glumly, “Sure, Uncle Zhang. I hope for world peace too. Really, I do.”

It was a noble wish, but one he couldn’t fulfill. Xie Wufang, who couldn’t tap into his strange powers just yet, probably couldn’t either.

…Couldn’t he pick something simpler?

Yu Bai thought it but didn’t say it.

Perhaps because he and Zhang Yunjiang were little more than strangers at this moment, the old man—who had seen much of life—wouldn’t share his deepest, most personal regrets with some kid he barely knew.

Or maybe a true final wish was like the time he’d asked Xie Wufang what gift he’d want in return, only for the other to say he didn’t know. You couldn’t imagine it unless you were truly in that situation.

Either way, directly asking Zhang Yunjiang about his dying wish was a dead end for now.

Zhang Yunjiang eyed Yu Bai’s slightly crestfallen expression and asked cautiously, “You got your answer?”

Yu Bai nodded.

“Was it a bad one?”

“No, it was great.”

Zhang Yunjiang let out a relieved breath. “Oh, good.”

He thought for a moment, then ventured tentatively, his eyes flicking toward the mostly silent Xie Wufang. “So, about what I mentioned earlier… Could we trouble this young comrade to teach us two old codgers Go…?”

Not really, since Comrade Xie here still had no clue what Go even was.

Maybe it was the memory of those relatives bickering endlessly at the funeral parlor while Zhang Yunjiang lay forgotten on the cremation table—Yu Bai couldn’t bring himself to refuse outright.

“He’s just getting into Go himself and needs time to get the hang of it,” Yu Bai said. “Uncle Zhang, give me your number. Once he’s up to speed, I’ll give you a call.”

Zhang Yunjiang’s eyes lit up. “Great! Wonderful! My number is…”

Yu Bai entered the digits into his phone and hit dial.

A loud ringtone soon blared from the old man’s pants pocket.

“Uncle Zhang, save my number too,” Yu Bai said. “If anything comes up and you need to reach me, call anytime.”

He paused, then added, “Like if you ever feel under the weather or anything.”

Zhang Yunjiang chuckled. “What, are you a doctor?”

Yu Bai mumbled evasively, “Something like that.”

Of course he wasn’t.

But he did know something bad was coming for this old man.

In the real world, nine days from now, that morning, Zhang Yunjiang’s body would be at this very stage—ready for cremation.

From years of observing at Yan Jing’s funeral parlor, that usually happened on the third day after death.

Those turtle bastard relatives had squabbled over it, mentioning how the old man had passed suddenly without a word, let alone a will sorting out his estate. Yuan Yuxing had angrily declared they’d hounded Old Zhang to death.

So it probably wasn’t some accident like a car crash. Zhang Yunjiang had likely died of a sudden illness.

He looked spry and sturdy—no signs of a terminal disease.

Most likely, then, some emotional upset had triggered a common and deadly heart or brain vessel issue in the elderly.

From the timelines and clues, Yu Bai figured that at least for today, Zhang Yunjiang was safe. He wouldn’t run into trouble so soon.

With that in mind, Yu Bai couldn’t resist offering a reminder. “Uncle Zhang, you need to keep a positive outlook. Whatever you do, don’t get mad.”

“Mad?” Zhang Yunjiang looked baffled. “I’m not mad!”

He settled back into his arms-crossed pose of casual confidence, grinning broadly. “I’m in high spirits right now! Heh heh, that last move of yours was straight out of left field—a stroke of pure genius. Beautiful!”

Zhang Yunjiang turned his gaze once more to the black-haired, blue-eyed Go prodigy and sighed in admiration. “I’ve never seen a young person with talent like yours. Sure, it all started with Old Yuan stirring up trouble, but thank goodness for his nonsense—it led us to discover you.”

“Young man, what’s your name?”

He fixed his eyes on Xie Wufang. Xie Wufang paused for a beat, then silently shifted his gaze to Yu Bai, as if asking whether he should respond.

…He had no clue what this human old man was going on about, did he?

Feeling a pang of guilt, Yu Bai jumped in quickly to answer for him. “His name is Xie Wufang—the ‘fang’ character that evokes brightness and new beginnings.”

“Oh, that’s a rare one.” Zhang Yunjiang pondered for a moment before saying sincerely, “When Fang appears, the year’s rhythms shift anew, lost in spring’s intoxicating haze without a care. What a fine name!”

Suddenly, Yu Bai felt like an utter philistine. The first time he’d heard Xie Wufang’s name, all he’d thought of was non-woven fabric.

While he was at it, he introduced himself to make things easier for the old man. “I’m Yu Bai—the ‘yu’ from melancholy, and the ‘bai’ from pale.”

There was no way he’d say “white” in front of Xie Wufang!

“Uncle Zhang, we have other business to attend to, so we’ll head out first.”

Yan Jing, Yuan Yuxing, and He Xi should have entered this timespace as well. Unlike Yu Bai, they hadn’t lived through the previous loops, and without Xie Wufang by their side, they were bound to be completely lost.

Yu Bai needed to track them down fast.

Before parting ways with Zhang Yunjiang, though, he still felt uneasy and made a point to instruct him. “Uncle Zhang, if anything comes up that puts you in a bad mood, feel free to give me a call.”

Zhang Yunjiang nodded along with the oddly intense concern, though he clearly didn’t quite get it. “Sure, sure… but why…”

Yu Bai thought for a second, then said with perfect sincerity, “Uncle Zhang, you remind me so much of my late grandfather. You feel like family right off the bat—like we’ve known each other forever.”

Of course, it was all made up.

He didn’t even have memories of his own mother, let alone a grandfather.

Zhang Yunjiang blinked at that, rubbing his hands together a bit awkwardly. He mumbled, “Ah, sounds like fate.”

Then, on reflex, he added, “Yu Bai, right? Bai… bai…”

“Bai” was such a commonplace character that it called up a whole basket of poetic lines. It would take forever just to pick one.

So after fumbling over it a few times, he pivoted smoothly, feigning composure. “Anyway, that’s a pretty unique surname you’ve got—a really distinctive name!”

No need to force the compliments.

Yu Bai couldn’t help but chuckle. “Yeah, I think so too.”

The white-haired old man let out a hearty laugh in response.

“I won’t keep you any longer—go take care of your business!” Zhang Yunjiang waved them off. “Catch you later!”

As they parted, the Go enthusiast cupped his hands into makeshift megaphones once again and whispered to what he saw as a Go genius. “Comrade Little Xie, give it some serious thought! Not that I’m pressuring you to teach us or anything! I’m heading out now!”

The old man’s figure gradually receded into the distance. Little Xie Comrade stared after him in blank confusion before turning away.

He glanced sideways and saw Yu Bai on the phone.

The screen showed “Yan Jing” as the contact, and the earpiece emitted a steady stream of ringing tones.

“Why isn’t he picking up…” Yu Bai muttered to himself.

By the normal timeline, Yan Jing should be wrapping up work soon. If his consciousness had transferred here too, he’d probably be at the gym right now.

Yu Bai was debating whether to call the gym directly when the man beside him spoke up.

“When you introduced me to him, you said ‘the bai from pale.'”

Xie Wufang asked, “Why not just say ‘white’?”

…Why bring up the one thing he wanted to avoid?

Yu Bai fell silent for a moment, then tried to steer the conversation elsewhere. “It was just some offhand phrasing—I didn’t think twice about it. Anyway, we’ve got a ton on our plate right now—”

They needed to contact and locate the other three people who might have ended up here, figure out how to escape this timespace, and once they got back to reality, study exactly how to give the Doom Orb a thorough thrashing…

Xie Wufang gave a slight nod at his words.

“Mm.” With a calm expression, the man brought up his earlier promise. “So, can you explain now?”


God as Neighbor

God as Neighbor

与神为邻
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

To gather material for his stories, pulp fiction writer Yu Bai rented a room in the city's infamous Haunted Neighborhood. Before long, he realized that his next-door neighbor was decidedly odd.

So he knocked on the neighbor's door and politely asked, "Are you human?"

Xie Wufang's expression flickered behind the door as he racked his brain for the relevant advice from the Human Life Guide. At last, he nodded with feigned composure.

Satisfied with the answer, Yu Bai turned and walked away, utterly calm.

Perfect. Definitely not human.

A week later, Yu Bai—now at the end of his rope—knocked on the strange neighbor's door once more. He clung to his last shred of restraint as he said, "Can you move out?"

Xie Wufang had the guide memorized backward and forward by now. He smiled with precisely the right amount of friendliness. "Sorry, has something been bothering you?"

Yu Bai's smile was all teeth and no warmth. "The guy next door beats drums with bones every single day. And the kid downstairs climbs out of the plumbing at night to make me help her with her homework."

Xie Wufang betrayed no surprise, offering his advice with warm enthusiasm. "Sounds like a public nuisance to me. You should call the cops."

Yu Bai finally snapped. He lunged forward and seized the mysterious neighbor by the collar, biting out each word: "Stop. Pretending."

"Either fix everything around here and make it normal again."

"Or get the hell out."

What Yu Bai didn't know was that his mysterious neighbor had been diligently reining in his power all along. Ordinary humans were simply too fragile—even the tiniest leak of divine energy could twist reality into absurd mutations.

And right then, Xie Wufang—experiencing his first real contact with a human—found himself momentarily distracted by the fearless threat inches from his face.

Human skin was this warm.

In that instant of distraction, an even greater mishap occurred.

Fearless, world-weary shut-in bottom × Persistent god top who strives every day to pass as human, only to veer hilariously off course

A non-standard infinite-flow tale: lighthearted, absurd summer adventures.

Comment

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
0 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

Options

not work with dark mode
Reset