The heavy snowfall lasted for two days.
The moment Ning Shuang woke up that morning, he pulled back the curtains and saw nothing but a vast expanse of white outside. The tree branches, weighed down by thick layers of snow, snapped with sharp cracking sounds.
It was freezing out there, but the heater inside made the room as warm as spring. A layer of white frost bloomed across the transparent glass window.
Ning Shuang reached out and drew a smiley face on the glass. Soon, water droplets gathered at the eyes and the corners of the mouth, sliding down like tears, trickling one after another. He quickly spread his palm to wipe the drawing away.
“Senior, what are you doing?” Ji Huaizhi’s voice suddenly sounded from behind him, startling Ning Shuang into a shiver.
He turned to look at Ji Huaizhi. “Nothing, just looking at the snow. How do you walk so quietly?”
Ji Huaizhi took his hand and carefully dried the water from his fingers with a tissue. “I did make noise. You were just too absorbed.”
He wrapped his arms around Ning Shuang’s waist from behind and continued, “I’ve been having nightmares lately. Dreams full of bad things.”
“What’s going on? Is it too cold at night? Or are you feeling unwell again?” Ning Shuang reached out to feel Ji Huaizhi’s forehead with his palm, but realizing his hand was still cold from the glass, he instead cradled the back of Ji Huaizhi’s head. He rose slightly on his tiptoes and pressed their foreheads together.
A perfectly normal temperature.
“It’s nothing. You’re worrying too much.” Being fussed over so caringly by his lover made Ji Huaizhi admit he was delighted; even the end of his sentence lifted unconsciously.
Only then did Ning Shuang relax. He took Ji Huaizhi’s hand and led him toward the door. “What are we having for breakfast?”
“I made corn porridge, and those brown sugar cakes you mentioned wanting last night.” The two tall men squeezed into the bathroom together. On the sink, Ning Shuang’s toothbrush was already loaded with toothpaste, lying neatly across the toothbrush cup.
Somewhat surprised, Ning Shuang popped the toothbrush into his mouth. Looking at Ji Huaizhi’s gentle face in the mirror, he mumbled, “Huh? Was I talking in my sleep?”
Ji Huaizhi took the toothbrush from his hand and took over the brushing. Things were different now from before; Ning Shuang could tell Ji Huaizhi genuinely enjoyed doing these little things for him. Over time, he grew accustomed to it and didn’t mind when it happened occasionally.
Snow continued to fall outside.
After breakfast, they curled up on the sofa downstairs to watch TV.
Ning Dundun lay obediently across Ning Shuang’s lap. Ning Shuang pinched its cheeks. “You’ve gotten chubby.”
At his side, Ji Huaizhi held Ning Shuang’s left hand, gently squeezing each finger in turn, and absentmindedly echoed, “Yeah, chubby.”
Ning Shuang then patted his own stomach. “I’ve gotten chubby too.”
Ji Huaizhi reached out to feel. “No, you haven’t.”
“It’s been a while since I went for a morning run.” Ning Shuang didn’t buy Ji Huaizhi’s sweet talk; the man was a pro at lying through his teeth.
“It’s cold now. Come spring, I’ll run with you in the mornings.” Ji Huaizhi snuggled closer to Ning Shuang.
Ning Shuang had noticed this long ago: whenever they were alone, Ji Huaizhi stuck to him like glue. He placed a hand on Ji Huaizhi’s forehead and pushed him back a little, smiling as he teased, “Ji Huaizhi, you’re so clingy.”
Ning Shuang was like a magnet. The moment he pushed Ji Huaizhi away, the man pressed right back in, wrapping his arms tightly around Ning Shuang’s waist. In a low voice, he murmured, “Are you tired of me?”
“I’ll never get tired of you, dear.” Ning Shuang had no idea what went on in Ji Huaizhi’s head all day.
“Mm.” Even with Ning Shuang’s firm reassurance, Ji Huaizhi showed no sign of letting go.
Ning Shuang let him be.
Winter break lasted over forty days.
Ning Shuang planned to spend ten of them with Ji Huaizhi, then head back to his hometown for the remaining thirty. That’s when he’d lift the love gu from Ji Huaizhi. Whatever the outcome, he’d shoulder the consequences when school started again.
That was Ning Shuang’s plan, but Ji Huaizhi knew nothing of it. He happily plotted their next few weeks with Ning Shuang—where to travel, where to ski, bringing Ning Dundun along so the three of them could have fun as a family.
But those ten days stretched on because of Ning Shuang’s soft heart. The Gu-Dissolving Medicine was ready long ago, but he could never find the right moment to give it to Ji Huaizhi. More than that, he simply couldn’t bear to part with this warmth.
And so, it dragged on.
Until that day.
Ji Huaizhi had some errand and left early. He was always like that—never leaving while Ning Shuang was awake. It was either very early or very late.
The moment Ji Huaizhi stepped out the door that morning, Ning Shuang jolted awake from a nightmare.
He felt the lingering warmth in the bedsheets beside him; it seemed Ji Huaizhi had gotten up not long ago. Sleep had fled him now. He sat up and checked the time: just past six in the morning. In winter, the sky wasn’t even light yet.
He had no idea what Ji Huaizhi was out doing so early.
But he didn’t want to ask. Just as he’d said from the start, Ji Huaizhi had his secrets, so Ning Shuang allowed him the same.
He grabbed the thick coat Ji Huaizhi had folded neatly by the bed and draped it over his shoulders. Yawning, he left the room. Downstairs, Ning Dundun was already awake, perched by the window watching the snowflakes drift down without so much as a blink.
Looking at the clothes on Ning Dundun, Ning Shuang suddenly remembered the New Year’s outfit he’d bought for it a couple days ago. He’d washed it and left it drying on the balcony in Ji Huaizhi’s room. He wondered if Ji Huaizhi had taken it in.
Ning Shuang turned and headed to Ji Huaizhi’s room.
The heating was on throughout the house, every room connected to the pipes, but Ji Huaizhi’s room still felt cold. Maybe because no one had slept there in ages?
The bedsheets and comforter were still the autumn set. The furnishings were sparse, standing forlornly in the space.
The curtains weren’t fully drawn. Ning Shuang walked out to the balcony and checked—no clothes hanging there, so Ning Dundun’s outfit must have been put away.
“Achoo!” A biting draft sneaked into his clothes from all sides. Ning Shuang shuddered and sneezed, then wrapped the coat tighter around himself as he hurried back inside.
He shut the balcony glass door firmly and drew the half-open curtains completely closed.
No light seeped in from outside.
Ning Shuang flicked the wall switch at random, turning on the room’s light.
Since he’d been with Ji Huaizhi, he’d rarely smelled that faint sandalwood scent on him. But now, in this room Ji Huaizhi had once lived in, the fragrance was so strong it inexplicably put Ning Shuang at ease.
He glanced over the desk and sofa—no sign of Ning Dundun’s clothes. Had they been stored together?
Ji Huaizhi’s everyday clothes were crammed in with Ning Shuang’s in his closet anyway.
He opened the closet and peered inside. Sure enough, it was mostly their summer clothes. Ji Huaizhi had sorted their winter and summer wardrobes, stashing them in separate closets.
Seeing the closet full of their shared clothes deepened the smile on Ning Shuang’s lips. He truly loved these tiny, everyday details.
Like the toothbrush always prepped with toothpaste every time he brushed his teeth. Or waking up to outfits on the nightstand matched to the day’s weather. Or even smaller things, like a toy Ning Dundun had chewed up that one day turned out to have been mended…
And so on.
Ning Shuang could go on forever.
These were all proof of Ji Huaizhi’s love for him.
But that’s exactly why Ning Shuang grew more and more uneasy.
Ji Huaizhi was always so hesitant, unable to cut ties cleanly. And so, things just kept going wrong.
Sigh.
Ning Shuang let out a breath and idly pushed through the clothes in the closet. He hadn’t really expected to find Ning Dundun’s outfit there.
But that casual sweep uncovered a secret hidden in the closet.
Photos. Lots of them.
They were connected by red string, forming a vast web. Right in the center was Ning Shuang’s ID photo.
Radiating outward were various snapshots from his daily life. His gaze slowly drifted over them.
Ning Shuang had some recollection of these photos; most were taken when he was with Ji Huaizhi. He hadn’t realized Ji Huaizhi had gotten them printed and arranged like this.
An outsider might think they’d been snapped from a voyeur’s angle.
Why? Why had Ji Huaizhi printed out all these photos, one by one, and pinned them up like this?
Ning Shuang reached out to touch them but found no other clues.
It was all so strange.
But Ji Huaizhi had always been someone deeply insecure. Maybe this was just his way of feeling safe?
Even so, Ning Shuang still felt a chill creep down his spine. He had always thought Ji Huaizhi’s clinginess and insecurity stemmed from his family background, leaving him so anxious and needy. But after everything that had happened since, Ning Shuang couldn’t shake the feeling that Ji Huaizhi was shrouded in mystery. Now, staring at those photos made his scalp crawl.
In the end, he chalked it up to Ji Huaizhi’s peculiar way of seeking reassurance. Ning Shuang tugged his jacket tighter around himself, shut the closet door, and walked away.
It was still early, and the cold outside was biting. Ning Shuang had no plans for a morning run. He wandered aimlessly downstairs for a bit before heading back up and slipping under the covers.
There was no place warmer than a bed in winter.
But sleep eluded him. The moment he closed his eyes, the nightmare that had jolted him awake earlier replayed in his mind. It was much the same as before: his secret about the love gu exposed, everyone utterly disillusioned with him. Ji Huaizhi stood among the crowd, gazing at him with eyes full of cold disappointment.
That was the gaze Ning Shuang saw whenever he shut his eyes.
His thoughts drifted to Lu Yuyang’s visceral disgust toward love gu as an ordinary person, and to Huo Lan’s words from that day. There was no way Ning Shuang could fall back asleep now.
He fished out his phone and checked flight schedules and pet shipping services. Sure enough, there was a flight back to his hometown in two days.
Ning Shuang rolled out of bed and settled at the desk.
Ji Huaizhi wasn’t home anyway. He might as well handle these arrangements now.
First up: the apology letter.
Ning Shuang had already planned out the letter in his head.
Before long, he had filled more than two pages with his words. He stashed the letter safely inside the desk drawer, then pulled out his phone and finally summoned the courage to buy the ticket.
This was the only real solution. He lacked the guts to face Ji Huaizhi once the love gu was broken. He couldn’t bear the thought of those cold eyes staring him down.
Just making these preparations brought Ning Shuang an unexpected sense of relief. He pressed a hand to his chest and thought, My conscience, turns out you haven’t vanished completely after all!
Perhaps that was why, after tucking away the paper and pen and climbing back into bed, Ning Shuang felt drowsiness return amid the warm covers. A fresh wave of sleepiness washed over him, and he drifted off into a deeply satisfying nap.
