No need to say it—Ning Shuang knew exactly who it was.
The winter night wind felt bitterly cold against the skin. Ning Shuang had only cracked the window open a sliver, but even that let in a gust that made him shiver.
Ji Huaizhi stood beneath the streetlamp, the wind lifting his long hair and the hem of his coat. He looked desolate and pitiable.
Ning Shuang leaned on the windowsill and stared at him for a while before finally giving in. He grabbed the coat from beside his bed, skirted around Ning Dundun who was sleeping on the rug, and carefully opened the door to head downstairs.
It was freezing outside.
Ning Shuang pushed open the front door and stepped out.
As if sensing something, Ji Huaizhi—who had been leaning against the lamppost—suddenly turned his head. His eyes met Ning Shuang’s, who was watching from the doorway.
A joyful expression immediately lit up his calm face. He hurried over to Ning Shuang’s side.
As he spoke, he shrugged off his coat and draped it over Ning Shuang’s shoulders. “Are you awake now?”
Ning Shuang grabbed his wrist and lifted the coat off, draping it back over Ji Huaizhi. “Put it on properly. Your health isn’t good.”
With that, he started walking forward. Ji Huaizhi put his coat back on and followed.
Neither of them spoke.
When they reached the roadside, Ning Shuang finally asked, “Why didn’t you go back to sleep?”
“I wanted to hear your thoughts sooner.” Ji Huaizhi answered honestly.
He slipped his hand into his coat pocket, his fingers rubbing against a candy wrapped in oiled paper.
Ning Shuang sighed. “You should go back and get some sleep first.”
Ji Huaizhi didn’t reply. He simply shook his head in refusal.
The wind picked up, tousling their hair. The world around them was shrouded in darkness, with only the streetlamp’s warm glow enveloping the two of them. Ning Shuang fell silent, and Ji Huaizhi pulled out the candy he’d been fiddling with in his pocket. He offered it to Ning Shuang. “Want some candy?”
Ning Shuang let out a chuckle, amused by the sudden, inexplicable gesture. “Will eating it make me forget all this?”
Though he asked that, he still reached out and took the candy from Ji Huaizhi’s palm. Ji Huaizhi added, “No… it won’t.”
“I know.” Ning Shuang peeled off the wrapper and popped the glistening candy into his mouth. Ji Huaizhi took the discarded paper from him and tucked it back into his pocket.
“Darling,” Ning Shuang said, looking up at him. “What do we do now?”
Those beautiful eyes shimmered with an ambiguous light under the streetlamp.
Ji Huaizhi’s throat bobbed. Only then did he realize that the depths of Ning Shuang’s gaze were filled with love.
A tear rolled from the corner of his eye. Ning Shuang helplessly lifted a hand to wipe it away. “There, there. No more crying. It’s nothing.”
He pulled Ji Huaizhi into an embrace.
The breath against his neck was hot and damp. Ji Huaizhi shed many tears—unlike the ones he’d shed before to garner sympathy, these came straight from the heart.
Ning Shuang loved him.
“There, darling,” Ning Shuang murmured, gently patting his back with a tender tone. “How do these tears keep coming?”
Ji Huaizhi sobbed, unable to get a single word out.
In that moment, even the icy night wind seemed to soften. Leaves rustled in the breeze, and their two hearts pressed tightly together, separated only by thin layers of flesh and clothing.
In the little villa behind them, on the second floor, someone quietly closed a window.
~~~
Ning Shuang had made his decision.
While he had been unconscious, they had seen that diary too. In truth, they had been making decisions for him from the very start—keeping him away from Ji Huaizhi, making him forget completely, making him leave this place…
No one had ever asked for Ning Shuang’s opinion.
~~~
A few days later, with only two days until New Year’s Eve.
The village still lacked any festive atmosphere. Ning Shuang woke unusually early that day. When he went downstairs, he saw his mother preparing vegetables for the New Year’s Eve dinner.
After he’d talked things out with Ji Huaizhi, his parents had stopped bringing up the matter between him and Ji Huaizhi. Still, Ning Shuang could tell they didn’t particularly like Ji Huaizhi.
For his part, Ning Shuang chose not to mention Ji Huaizhi in front of them. As a result, the two of them had only been chatting over the phone for several days now. They hadn’t seen each other, or if they had, it was just a quick meeting while Ning Shuang took Ning Dundun out for a walk.
“Mom? Need any help?” Ning Shuang unclipped Ning Dundun’s leash, letting it scamper off to run wild in the yard.
Zhou Mingyu gave Ning Shuang a gentle smile. “No need. Go wash your hands and get ready for breakfast.”
Though she refused, Ning Shuang still sat down at the table and started peeling garlic to help out.
“Little Shuang, what do you want to eat for New Year’s? Mom will have Dad go out and buy it for you,” Zhou Mingyu asked, her eyes full of tenderness as she gazed at him.
Ning Shuang kept his head down. “Nothing in particular. Just like we always have for New Year’s.”
Zhou Mingyu knew Ning Shuang disliked the village’s New Year’s vibe. If he had the choice, he’d prefer spending it in Huai’an City. She was about to say something when her gaze lingered on the smooth skin of Ning Shuang’s nape. The mark from the Forbidden Gu had completely vanished, leaving only flawless, pale skin behind.
The Forbidden Gu was gone?
Zhou Mingyu’s eyes darkened slightly. She set down the cabbage in her hands and reached out to touch Ning Shuang’s nape. The chill of her fingers made him shiver, but he didn’t pull away. He just looked at her in confusion. “Mom?”
Zhou Mingyu withdrew her hand and forced a mild smile. “Nothing. Mom just thought she saw something there.”
“Hm?” Ning Shuang craned his neck to look back. Zhou Mingyu smiled and explained, “I must have been seeing things. It’s fine.”
“Oh, okay.” Ning Shuang hummed in acknowledgment and went back to peeling garlic.
Zhou Mingyu’s mind was elsewhere now. She simply set down her cabbage, dragged her chair back, and sat down. Seeing that she seemed to have something to say, Ning Shuang put down what he was holding too.
“Little Shuang, there are some things… even if you don’t say them, I know.” Zhou Mingyu sighed. “You have feelings for that Ji Yao boy, don’t you?”
Ning Shuang didn’t speak, but his silence was answer enough.
Zhou Mingyu continued, “Can you tell Mom when… when you started having these feelings?”
Ning Shuang lowered his head. He wasn’t sure, but these past few days, he’d been dreaming frequently of lost memories from the past. He’d realized that his concern and attention toward Ji Huaizhi had started even earlier than he’d thought.
Otherwise, why would he have persisted in making that arduous trek to the Back Mountain so many times—a path full of poisonous insects and plants he hated—just to keep company with the lonely Ji Huaizhi?
“A very long time ago,” Ning Shuang said. “Very, very long ago.”
“How long is ‘very long’? Before you got sick?” Zhou Mingyu asked.
Ning Shuang nodded.
That meant before Ji Huaizhi had cast the Forbidden Gu.
With that answer from Ning Shuang, Zhou Mingyu finally found some peace.
“Are you happy with him?” Tears seemed to glisten in her eyes as she tremblingly lifted a hand to touch his face.
Ning Shuang took hold of his mother’s hand and gently nuzzled it—a silent gesture, a silent reply.
The skin around Zhou Mingyu’s eyes reddened. “Let’s go back to Huai’an City for New Year’s.”
“Hm?” Ning Shuang didn’t understand why his mom had suddenly suggested that.
Zhou Mingyu explained, “You really don’t seem to like it here.”
“I don’t, but I’ve gotten by for so many years. It’s fine,” Ning Shuang said.
Zhou Mingyu insisted, “Let’s go back for New Year’s. Your dad and I will pay respects at the ancestral graves, then join you.”
Ning Shuang replied, “Then we’ll wait until after the ancestral rites and go together.”
Paying respects to the ancestors on the first day of the New Year was a village custom. Even if they were leaving, they had to visit the graves before departing.
“No need. You go ahead. Clean the house and stock up on New Year’s goods.” She paused, then added gently, “Bring that Ji Yao boy along too.”
Ji Huaizhi’s parents had died early—around when he was sixteen, both had passed away from illness one after another. For the years since, he’d been on his own. Ning Shuang was unaware of this, but Zhou Mingyu knew all too well.
Surprise flickered in Ning Shuang’s eyes as he looked at Zhou Mingyu. She withdrew her hand and joked, “What? Do you think Mom’s the unreasonable type?”
“No, Mom.” Ning Shuang hurried to reassure her, but Zhou Mingyu cut in. She continued, “I know you’ve sorted out your issues with that boy. That’s your happiness—I can’t interfere forever. And him… he’s so extreme in how he does things.”
But now, thinking back, she felt she could understand it somewhat.
Ji Huaizhi’s parents had never properly educated him growing up. They’d treated him entirely as the future Clan Leader in their training, leaving him with deficiencies in expressing emotions. That was why he’d come to see Ning Shuang as his one and only—as a possession.
Strangely, though, when they’d first met Ji Yao, he’d seemed no different from any other child. It wasn’t until the Forbidden Gu incident came to light later that they’d witnessed his obsessiveness.
“Go back to Huai’an City with him. He’s been standing guard downstairs every night,” Zhou Mingyu said.
Ning Shuang froze. He had no idea about that. That night when Ji Huaizhi had waited below, he’d thought it was just to get his answer.
After a long silence, Ning Shuang slowly nodded. “Alright.”
He knew exactly what his mom had meant beyond her words—that there was still an unresolved “issue” between him and Ji Huaizhi.
She’d had him head to Huai’an City early precisely so they could sort out this “issue” sooner.
After breakfast, Ning Shuang sent Ji Huaizhi a message explaining the situation. That very afternoon, the two of them boarded a flight back to Huai’an City.
From the moment they left Qianning Village, Ji Huaizhi had gripped Ning Shuang’s hand tightly, as if afraid he might slip away at any moment.
Ning Shuang didn’t say much about it.
Only once they were on the plane did his hand finally get a break.
“Why the sudden decision to spend the New Year back in Huai’an City?” Ji Huaizhi finally had a chance to ask.
Ning Shuang leaned back and gazed out the window. “I don’t like that place.”
Ji Huaizhi pressed his lips together and softly murmured his agreement. “Okay.”
“Get some rest. I’ll wake you when we land,” Ning Shuang said, turning to him with a gentler tone.
Ji Huaizhi shook his head. “I’m not tired.”
But the faint dark circles under his eyes told a different story. Thinking of his mother’s words, Ning Shuang took hold of Ji Huaizhi’s hand. “Sleep. We’re on a plane—I promise I won’t jump out mid-flight.”
“It’s not that, I…” Ji Huaizhi started to explain subconsciously, but Ning Shuang had already closed his eyes. He tilted his head onto Ji Huaizhi’s shoulder and murmured slowly, “I’m tired too. Let’s sleep, darling.”
Those simple, understated words soothed Ji Huaizhi’s restless heart like nothing else. His long lashes fluttered, and he squeezed Ning Shuang’s hand before tilting his own head against Ning Shuang’s and drifting off to sleep.
The four-hour flight passed in no time.
After picking up their checked baggage—including Ning Dundun—they got into the car heading home. As Ning Shuang watched the increasingly familiar scenery roll by outside the window, a wave of emotion washed over him. The trees lining the roads were already decked out with red lanterns and colorful string lights that would glow come evening.
The New Year’s spirit wasn’t as thick in the big city as it might be elsewhere, but at least here, it felt like the holiday was actually happening—unlike Qianning Village.
Back home, Ning Shuang discovered that Ji Huaizhi had cleaned the entire place top to bottom before they left.
“Alright, you go rest,” Ning Shuang said as he grabbed his coat from the rack by the door, preparing to head out. Ji Huaizhi hurried after him. “I’ll come with you.”
Ning Shuang didn’t refuse. He knew exactly what Ji Huaizhi was worried about, and he didn’t want any friction between them right now, especially not at a time like this. They bought groceries for the next couple of days at the supermarket and returned just as dusk was falling.
They cooked dinner together. After eating and taking Ning Dundun for a walk, it was already past eight in the evening.
Throughout it all, wherever Ning Shuang went, Ji Huaizhi stuck to him like glue—even standing guard outside the bathroom door while he showered.
The sound of running water started up inside. Ji Huaizhi leaned against the wall by the door, listening quietly. But just a few minutes later, the water suddenly stopped.
Ji Huaizhi glanced anxiously at the bathroom door. It swung open from within, a puff of steamy mist billowing out. Ning Shuang emerged shirtless, grabbed Ji Huaizhi’s hand, and yanked him inside.
Before Ji Huaizhi could even react, Ning Shuang had him pinned against the door. He cupped Ji Huaizhi’s face and kissed him.
It had been over half a month since their lips had last met.
One pair cool, the other warm and damp. As they pressed together, the kiss deepened, their temperatures equalizing.
Tongues intertwined, breaths mingled, until Ning Shuang hoisted Ji Huaizhi up onto the bathroom counter.
…
Half an hour later, Ning Shuang slumped against Ji Huaizhi’s shoulder, panting. His gaze fell on the clearly defined veins along Ji Huaizhi’s neck, flushed a light pink. In a surge of exasperation, he bit down.
“Ji Huaizhi, I honestly don’t know what to say to you.” Ning Shuang pushed him back a step. “What exactly are you so anxious about?”
“You think I’m going to leave? That I’ll vanish without a word?”
“…” Ji Huaizhi fell silent. He leaned in to kiss Ning Shuang, but was shoved away with clear irritation.
“Is that really what you think of me?” Ning Shuang demanded.
Ji Huaizhi shook his head. “I love you, Ning Shuang. I love you.”
Those repeated confessions broke through Ning Shuang’s resistance. He pulled Ji Huaizhi into a tight embrace. “I know, darling. Nothing’s going to happen.”
“I’m not going anywhere. We’ll always be together.”
“Stop feeling so insecure, okay? I love you more than you realize.” If it wasn’t love, how could Ji Huaizhi’s mistakes have been forgiven so easily?
Ning Shuang’s words acted like a balm. In that moment, Ji Huaizhi’s anxious heart finally settled.
“I’m sorry,” Ji Huaizhi murmured, hugging him even tighter.
Ning Shuang nodded. “I know.”
It had been nearly a week since Huai’an City last saw snow.
But that night, soft flakes began drifting down again, swirling in the cold wind before settling on the ground.
Inside, the house was warm and cozy. Delicate frost crystals formed pretty patterns on the transparent glass windows.
The two men nestled together in the soft bed, a faint fresh scent lingering in the air. Ning Shuang gently patted the back of the man in his arms. “Sleep now, darling.”
Because of love, I’m willing to forgive the lies you wove out of love for me.
