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Chapter 33: – Tao Fangyi: Bad Kid


Tao Fangyi watched Liu Wen go from resistance to something approaching enjoyment.

Back then, she really was bold in her imagination. The helicopter had already soared into the stratosphere. Never mind the helicopter’s performance specs, she even stuck her head out. With the cabin unsealed and unpressurized, she felt neither cold nor oxygen-deprived. It completely defied the laws of physics, but this was a dream. Here, anything was possible.

Of course, the two characters who followed her had simply flown up into the stratosphere on their own, which was even more outrageous.

Liu Wen gazed at the cloud layers beneath the helicopter. After staring for a good long while, she suddenly asked, “If I jump off, will I die?”

“You want to use a fake death escape?” Wang asked her.

Liu Wen replied, “I want to let loose.”

“You won’t die,” Tao Fangyi said. “Want to give it a try?”

Was this the attitude Tao Fangyi had toward all young people?

Wang let out a soft click of his tongue.

Liu Wen nodded excitedly.

She spent a moment psyching herself up, then suddenly leaped off with a ferocious dive. The male lead who followed her jumped right after her.

“Woohoo!!!” The sensation of weightlessness was still there. Liu Wen spread her arms wide, feeling the chaotic wind.

At first, Liu Wen kept her eyes shut.

She counted silently in her heart.

She was a very hardworking person. She studied hard, worked hard, and tried her hardest to prove herself to everyone.

Real life was nothing like a web novel. Her boss wasn’t some overbearing CEO—he was just a potbellied man who came up with whatever whim struck him next.

No one wore professional attire every day. Wearing high heels to work every day really did make your feet hurt.

Everything was far less glamorous.

But Liu Wen had adapted well. Her school was good, her job was good, and she got along reasonably well with her colleagues.

In truth, she had nothing to be miserable about. Her fiancé was also very gentle.

A few minor problems in life were perfectly normal. After all, no one’s life was truly perfect, and Liu Wen’s life was already a dream for most people.

She had no real regrets.

But now, those realities were sealed off, left outside this fantasy. Now, she had to abandon those realities completely and play along with a clichéd, old-fashioned story.

What was there in fantasy? Impractical, exaggerated romance.

It was like being forced to take a vacation, to celebrate a holiday, a holiday exclusively for her.

Here, she only needed to be kind, and everyone would come to love her.

If she fell to rock bottom, someone would find her and reach out a hand, just like in a Cinderella story.

“Almost there,” Tao Fangyi said.

Liu Wen opened her eyes. She did a flip and finally landed steadily on the ground.

“Hahaha!” Liu Wen raised both arms high.

“Did you like it?” Tao Fangyi asked her.

Liu Wen nodded. Once in a while, indulging in a cliché dream wasn’t so bad.

“Next, you have to attend a ball,” Tao Fangyi reminded her. “You’ll wear simple clothes to the ball, get mocked for it, and in the end, Huangfu Yuan will come to your rescue.”

“Let’s go, let’s go.” Liu Wen dusted the dirt off her backside.

“You’re happy now?” Tao Fangyi asked her.

“Even if I can’t be happy, I’ll play to my heart’s content,” she said. After all, no one else would ever know about this, and she’d never have a second chance to play this kind of role.

Tao Fangyi smiled.

He followed Liu Wen and watched the entire performance unfold.

He watched as Sophia stormed off in fury at the end, and the story concluded with a grand wedding.

Those fantasy creatures couldn’t bear to part with their creator.

“If you stay here forever, you can have anything you want,” Sophia said. “This will be your real world. You won’t feel pain. You can taste food. Everyone here loves you… well, except for me, of course.” She hadn’t forgotten her assigned role.

“If you think we’re not good-looking enough, you can change our appearances. We can look like big stars,” another fantasy creature said.

“You never have to grow up!”

“You can always be a kid! We will always hug you!”

Wang poked Tao Fangyi. “Do you think she’ll stay?”

Tao Fangyi shook his head. “No.”

Sure enough, Liu Wen’s response to all this was simply to pat their heads. “But my reality is something I earned through my own hard work.”

“My understanding of this world has been shattered and rebuilt over and over. In order to get into a good school, I was anxious and miserable. I do also think that boss at my company has a few screws loose.” The more Liu Wen talked, the more she felt that her real life was just so-so.

“But I’ve truly put so much effort into my own life. If I choose to stay with you now, what was all my hard work for?” Liu Wen asked.

“Sunk costs shouldn’t affect major decisions,” one of the fantasy creatures warned. Who knew where it had even picked up that line.

“It’s not a sunk cost,” she said. “I’m just trying to take control of my own life. I don’t want to burrow into a dream woven by my own mind, never growing up.”

“Reality isn’t that perfect.”

“But imperfection is the true reality,” Liu Wen said. This time, she didn’t treat her fantasy creatures violently. “I’m sorry, I can’t go back to being my old self.”

“This dream was quite fun.”

“But I’m sorry, I still have a life to live.”

Grabbing Wang, Tao Fangyi slowly withdrew from this dream.

They entered another older cousin’s dream.

The same development, the same sense of humiliation, until finally, the cousin picked up a weapon and started fighting Bosses step by step. He exposed the hypocritical Alliance Chief, defeated him, and took over the Alliance Chief’s seat.

The cousin’s choice was the same.

The adventure in the dream was quite interesting. Being a Great Hero could truly satisfy his vanity.

But he had his own life and a family.

Those beauties were breathtakingly lovely, so lovely they didn’t seem real.

But his wife was his high school classmate. They’d gotten into the same university, dated for seven years, and finally stepped into marriage. They’d experienced a long stretch of life together and would experience even more together in the future.

His daughter was adorable.

His love was almost entirely entrusted to his family members.

Those beautiful women were like a group of children who understood nothing. To him, they were just children.

Battling heaven and earth was great fun. Here, he could be the strongest. But back in reality, he was just a high-level corporate wage slave.

Yet his life was a life born from his efforts. He couldn’t just cut away his own growth to play some make-believe house game.

If he fell asleep forever, all his efforts would turn to dust. His beloved wife would bear the family’s burdens alone. His child would no longer remember him, and the concept of “Dad” would cease to exist.

No matter what, he could never stay in the dream.

The two adults didn’t hesitate. They briefly indulged in the adventures of the past, but in the end, they chose reality.

They left the past behind where it belonged, only sighing with nostalgia the rare times they happened to leaf through those old memories.

They had grown up.

They could no longer return to that fantasy world they had created.

The two groups of fantasy creatures were dragged out of the dream by Tao Fangyi. Their obsessions hadn’t dissipated yet, but they had already shut down completely.

“What a pity,” Wang said. He’d originally wanted to play the whole ‘vicious male supporting role’ game, but the other party’s emotions hadn’t shattered the way he’d hoped. His whole battle strategy went unused.

“Yeah, such a pity,” said the robot. “Their masters don’t love them that much. Not like our master.”

Tao Fangyi, Wang, and the Blade Spirit all turned to look at the robot.

While sympathizing with the two groups of fantasy creatures, the robot was also stealthily showing off. “I think it’s pretty strange. Our master has had us for a long time, too, but he never gets bored of us. Maybe our master is just more nostalgic.”

“Your master is only six years old,” Wang reminded him.

Tao Fangyi, now back in his Tyrannosaurus Rex form, was unable to physically cover Wang’s mouth.

“He hasn’t even reached the age where kids write stories for fun yet,” Wang said. “You’ll be forgotten long before that. He’s in elementary school already. Kids mature early these days. By second or third grade, he’ll probably be playing mobile games. You bunch will end up living in that toy box. Who exactly are you trying to comfort here?”

The physical toys looked at Wang in unison.

“What are you looking at me for?” Wang asked. “Did you think otherwise?”

The physical toys burst into loud wails.

“Their obsessions still haven’t faded. What should we do?” Tao Fangyi asked the Blade Spirit.

“Why haven’t the obsessions faded?” the Blade Spirit asked, not understanding.

Sophia spoke up: “She’s gone bad.”

Huangfu Yuan followed immediately: “She abandoned us.” This time, it was a true abandonment.

On the other side, the mighty warrior spoke: “He’s no longer passionate.”

The chubby mouse man followed right on cue: “He doesn’t even like Junior Sister anymore!”

They gathered together, emitting black mist.

“He shouldn’t live like this,” someone shouted.

“Her development is holding her back!”

“And the person he likes! If that person disappeared, he’d get better!”

“Her fiancé is too ordinary! Everything around her is so ordinary! She shouldn’t be so ordinary!”

The resentment grew deeper and heavier.

Wang froze for a moment, then his grin widened.

This time, he said nothing, letting the resentment develop on its own.

If these fantasy creatures were corrupted by their resentment and turned, once they actually did something, he would be able to reap the rewards.

So much resentment. Their screams would surely be exquisite.

The space before their eyes seemed to shudder. Wang clutched his chest. This feeling was very familiar. Tao Fangyi had opened a barrier.

Tao Fangyi’s barrier was practically indistinguishable from real life. The surrounding scenery didn’t turn black and white, making it very hard to tell if his barrier had been activated.

A reserve in the probationary period would normally have their Fear Value suppressed during a mission.

Yet now, Tao Fangyi looked incredibly terrifying.

Black mist shrouded Tao Fangyi’s face. He adjusted his gloves and walked slowly toward the group of fantasy creatures that were in the process of turning.

“This is no longer a child throwing a tantrum,” Tao Fangyi said, sounding angry. “Destroying someone else’s family, even wanting to hurt innocent people… you’ve crossed the line.”

“You can’t control us!” one of the fantasy creatures roared at Tao Fangyi.

Tao Fangyi raised one hand. He produced his modernized “little bamboo stick”—a teaching whip/pointer.

The fantasy creature that had shouted at him involuntarily stretched out its hand.

“After you’re punished, every single one of you will write a ten-thousand-word self-criticism essay for me. I will check every single word,” Tao Fangyi said. He grabbed the fantasy creature’s hand and smacked the pointer down directly. “I will educate you until you understand you were wrong.”

Wang touched his own neck, where a red ring was imprinted.

Sometimes, this Uncle Tao really was too strict.


You’re a Bit Too Extreme

You’re a Bit Too Extreme

你有点太极端了
Status: Completed Native Language: Chinese

Tao Fangyi is a horror doll in his internship phase. To earn himself a body, he works hard to terrify buyers and collect their fear.

This time, he arrives at a new home. Besides the standard family of three, there's a special presence—a shackled Evil Ghost.

Tao Fangyi openly introduces his origins and identity to the Evil Ghost, only to watch the ghost, wreathed in black smoke, ask with confusion: "Collecting fear? Are you going to slaughter this entire family?"

Tao Fangyi: Uh, no, I have a license...

Evil Ghost: If you don’t want them, can I kill them?

Tao Fangyi: Did they harm you?

Evil Ghost: I don't even know them.

Later, Tao Fangyi discovers this Evil Ghost wants to kill everyone, from centenarians down to three-year-old children. Though the ghost hasn't stained his hands with blood yet, he’s already fully prepared to send all of humanity straight to the Underworld.

Tao Fangyi gives the Evil Ghost ideological talks while helping him search for his past.

According to the Evil Ghost, he's supposed to have a terribly tragic childhood, a pair of utterly inhuman parents, and a class full of people who isolated him. In the end, he should have died in despair and loneliness.

But later, Tao Fangyi discovers the Evil Ghost is not an Evil Ghost at all. He is the Separated Soul of the Special Biological Management Bureau’s sunniest, gentlest Captain.

The Captain’s smile is like the sun itself, yet his Separated Soul skitters around in the shadows every day, styling himself as a Fierce Ghost.

---

Steadfast, upright, company-drone uncle-type Horror Doll (Top) X Berserker who’s been driven nearly insane by a forced day job (Bottom)

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