Chapter 41
You still expect someone to like you…
Those words were like a brand burned onto Lu Yichuan’s soul, haunting him for the rest of his life.
He didn’t deserve love.
The only time he had yearned for love, he had lost it forever.
The price had been too steep, so steep that every night, he would replay the past in his mind, wondering if he had asked for too much, been too greedy, and that was why he had been punished so cruelly.
Now, given a second chance, he would temper his desires, only asking for one thing – for him to stay by his side.
He couldn’t let go.
Jiang Heng was his, and even in death, he wouldn’t let go.
…
In those few short moments, Jiang Heng hadn’t realized how much was going through Lu Yichuan’s mind.
He looked at the discarded collar and, as if making a decision, stepped on it with his paw.
He wasn’t sure if stepping on it would activate it, so he tentatively called out, “Lu Yichuan?”
The man’s long eyelashes fluttered.
“I’m sorry,” Jiang Heng said. “I shouldn’t have kept it from you. I knew you would be sad, but I didn’t know you would be this sad. If I had known, I would have told you on the first day.”
The boy’s voice was clear and bright, as if all the good in the world was concentrated in him.
“Please don’t be sad anymore. If there’s a problem, we can talk about it and solve it together. Don’t keep it bottled up, it’s not good for you.”
Lu Yichuan’s fingers twitched on his knee. Finally, he raised his head, his voice hoarse from disuse, “You…don’t blame me?”
Jiang Heng looked at him. “I’ve never blamed you.”
After a moment of thought, the kitten walked over and rubbed against him, his eyes narrowed, purring softly.
A gesture of complete trust.
Even after everything Lu Yichuan had done, he still depended on him.
Finally, the man raised his hand and stroked the kitten’s neck, his fingertips brushing against its soft fur, the sensation sending a shiver down his spine.
“I can never resist you.”
A soft sigh echoed in the air.
Lu Yichuan picked up the collar, his eyes dark as he looked at Jiang Heng. “You saw just now, my true nature isn’t what you think it is. If you don’t wear this collar, there’s still a chance for you to escape. But if you choose to wear it…”
“Rongrong…” he said, “From now on, even in death, you can’t leave my side.”
Jiang Heng looked at him, noticing the slight tremor in his fingers despite his calm expression.
Their eyes met, and after a few seconds, Jiang Heng slowly lowered his head, offering his neck to the cage Lu Yichuan had built for him.
No one knew that, compared to Lu Yichuan’s fear of losing him, Jiang Heng was even more afraid of being abandoned by him.
The sun began to set, the room darkening, and in the dim light, Lu Yichuan fastened the collar around Jiang Heng’s neck.
The white kitten lowered its head, seemingly accepting his confinement, but Lu Yichuan felt like it was him who was being bound.
A dragon guarding its treasure, holding the key in its mouth, forever coiled around its precious hoard.
Click.
A soft sound. Jiang Heng twitched his ears and looked up. “Meow?”
[Can you understand me now?]
“Yes.”
Jiang Heng curiously pawed at the bell, its limited reach only making it swing slightly. “Why?”
Perhaps due to the emotional turmoil, Lu Yichuan leaned back against the sofa, his expression weary, but his eyes remained fixed on Jiang Heng, answering every question patiently.
“The red string I tied on you is the same as the one on my neck. When you’re wearing it, I can understand what you’re saying.”
Jiang Heng looked at his neck and saw a flash of red beneath his open collar, a pendant attached to it that he had never seen before.
Jiang Heng’s gaze lingered on the pendant.
Lu Yichuan shifted, the red disappearing beneath his shirt.
“That’s…” Jiang Heng started to ask, but Lu Yichuan interrupted him. “The red string was given to me by a strange man.”
Jiang Heng was immediately distracted. “A man? What man? Can you find him again?”
“I haven’t been able to find him yet.”
“Oh…” Jiang Heng responded. “So how does it work? Can you understand what other cats are saying too?”
Lu Yichuan thought of the dream and the man’s instructions, the blood-soaked finger bone still hanging around his neck, its owner staring at him.
“Probably just you.”
Jiang Heng: “?”
But Lu Yichuan wasn’t planning to explain further.
He held the cat close, picked up the cold cat food, and went to the kitchen. “That’s not important. What I’m curious about is…”
He placed the cat food back in the steamer. “…why didn’t Rongrong want to tell me?”
He was back to his usual calm, collected self, as if the vulnerability from moments ago had been an illusion.
Jiang Heng wasn’t used to the vulnerable Lu Yichuan from earlier, but this Lu Yichuan was the one he was familiar with.
Familiar, but it made him feel guilty.
And when he felt guilty, he kneaded. The man’s clean shoulder was soon covered in gray paw prints.
“Sigh…”
Lu Yichuan turned on the stove and the exhaust fan. The kitten’s reflection appeared on the black surface of the hood.
“I’ve been thinking about this. I thought it was because I had done something wrong that Rongrong would rather endure everything alone than tell me you were right here beside me.”
“But I can’t figure it out…”
He said, “I’ve caused you so much suffering, and I can’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me.”
“Are you…afraid of me?”
Jiang Heng shook his head.
“It’s not like that.”
The hissing of the steamer almost drowned out his voice.
“I wasn’t afraid of you. I just…”
For the first time in a long while, he opened his heart to Lu Yichuan.
“I just didn’t know what to do.”
“I woke up as a cat, and I wanted to find you on the first day, but I didn’t even know where I was. Then I realized it was four years later.”
“A year or two would have been fine, but four years… The grass on my grave would be so tall by then. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do…”
After he finished speaking, silence filled the room, only the hissing of the steamer.
Jiang Heng felt the shoulder beneath his paws stiffen.
He lowered his head, snuggling against Lu Yichuan’s neck. “Lu Yichuan, I wasn’t afraid of bothering you, I was afraid you wouldn’t want me anymore.”
“I don’t have a home. Mom and Dad aren’t my real parents. I only have you. If you didn’t want me anymore, I wouldn’t know where to go…”
“Four years is a long time, I…I didn’t dare to gamble.”
Jiang Heng’s voice was soft, hesitant.
“Taking care of a cat is much easier than taking care of a person.”
…
Taking care of a cat is much easier than taking care of a person.
After a long silence, Lu Yichuan opened the steamer. The fragrant cat food was steaming hot again.
The light above cast their shadows on the floor, merging into one. Lu Yichuan blinked, suppressing the sudden ache in his eyes.
“Taking care of a cat is indeed easier than taking care of a person, but I’m used to taking care of a person, not a cat.”
He finally understood why Jiang Heng hadn’t told him the truth.
His cat was much more insecure than he had imagined.
“It’s my fault…” he said.
Jiang Heng was stunned. “How is this your fault?”
Lu Yichuan, embracing his role as guardian, said, “Anything that happens to Rongrong is my fault.”
Jiang Heng was speechless.
Lu Yichuan carried the cat and the food bowl out of the kitchen.
Jiang Heng, smelling the delicious cat food, couldn’t help but knead again. “Aren’t you…scared?” he asked.
The man paused and turned slightly.
“About me dying and coming back to life as a cat?”
Lu Yichuan put down the bowl and held the cat. “I’m overjoyed. Why would I be scared?”
He added, “Kittens are cute. And if Rongrong is a kitten, he’s even cuter.”
Jiang Heng purred happily. “Lu Yichuan, you’re so nice.”
Lu Yichuan lowered his eyes, picked up a cat-paw-shaped spoon, scooped up some cat food, and held it near Jiang Heng’s mouth. “Am I?”
Jiang Heng took a bite. “The best.”
The man smiled. “Let’s settle the score after you finish eating.”
“…”
Jiang Heng froze. “Settle the score?”
He popped a piece of fresh carrot into the kitten’s mouth, his expression gentle. “I’ll reflect on my mistakes, but that doesn’t mean I’ll let this go.”
Jiang Heng couldn’t even taste the carrot. “Why?”
Lu Yichuan looked down at him, a gentle mask over his overbearing, controlling nature.
“Because Rongrong never learns. When something happens, instead of coming to me, you worry about all sorts of unnecessary things.”
He bent down, his eyes level with Jiang Heng’s.
“I don’t care how you treat others, but remember this: I’m different. I’ll always be there for you. You’re the most important person to me, Rongrong. No one in this world is more important than you.”
He stared at him intently, as if trying to carve his next words into Jiang Heng’s soul.
“My feelings for you will never change.”
Jiang Heng’s breath hitched.
Lu Yichuan didn’t go to the university for two weeks, vanishing without a trace, not even his tutor could reach him.
Zhao Shuo, who seemed close to him, realized he knew nothing about Lu Yichuan. Besides academics, he didn’t even know where he lived, what he liked to do, or who his friends were. In the end, he could only contact Song Zhang, whom he had met a few times.
Song Zhang didn’t know where he was either. He even went to the hidden room in his villa, but he wasn’t there.
He anxiously followed the news every day, afraid of seeing reports about an unidentified male body found somewhere.
Finally, after his relentless barrage of messages, Lu Yichuan called him back one morning.
Song Zhang immediately launched into a tirade, but the man didn’t retort, just listened quietly, as if he had only called to reassure him and was about to hang up after he was done.
“Wait!” Song Zhang stopped him. “Where are you now?”
There was wind on the other end of the line, and Lu Yichuan’s voice was faint. “It’s not important. Don’t look for me. I’m fine.”
“Fine, my ass!” Song Zhang yelled. “Do you know how worried everyone is about you? Your classmates asked me to tell you that if you don’t come back, your tutor won’t give you your diploma! Two years of graduate school wasted!”
Lu Yichuan chuckled. “So be it. I wasn’t that keen on graduating anyway.”
Exasperated, Song Zhang started laughing instead.
He knew Lu Yichuan wasn’t in any state to listen to reason, so he hung up and went to find Jiang Zhuo.
Jiang Zhuo, as a CEO, even if the Jiang family had declined, still had some resources at his disposal.
After some maneuvering, Jiang Zhuo managed to find the address of Lu Yichuan’s new villa.
He stared at the address with a grim smile, and early the next morning, he and Song Zhang went there.
Song Zhang rang the doorbell, prepared to climb the wall if necessary, but within minutes, Lu Yichuan opened the door.
The man stood tall and straight, his face still pale, but he seemed much more…alive than before. A cat was perched on his shoulder, and he didn’t have his usual lifeless demeanor.
Seeing Song Zhang, Lu Yichuan’s expression changed slightly, as if remembering something.
