When they saw the room, the ones who were shocked weren’t just Yu Xi and Yi Chen.
Even the host was a bit caught off guard. “Whoa… oh… this is a really unique room, huh.”
The director silently turned to the staff member responsible for booking the rooms.
That staff member silently looked away. “When I booked it, this was the only double room left. You didn’t specify any theme.”
The director: “…”
After a quick tour of the room, the show continued. The host headed to the next room, leaving Yu Xi and Yi Chen alone in the wedding room, staring at each other wide-eyed.
At that moment, silence spoke louder than words—the bullet comments had already started setting off fireworks.
【My CP, force them to get married!】
【Hehe, the scene I wanted to see most happened—my mortal enemies shoved into the same room.】
【I really love watching them interact. Wonder what’ll happen when they sleep together.】
【Early~ birth~ of~ a~ healthy~ baby~】
【Move already! Did I lag? Why is there zero action on screen?】
【Help, what do I do if I have to sleep with my mortal enemy hahahaha!】
【System crashed, CPU fried.】
In the third minute of the frozen screen, Yu Xi and Yi Chen finally moved. They rushed to opposite ends of the room from left and right, each pulling sticky notes from their pockets at the same time.
Yu Xi slapped a pink sticky note on something: “Don’t touch these two bottles of mineral water—they’re mine!”
Yi Chen picked a blue sticky note: “The tissues and toilet paper are mine!”
“That pillow? Mine. No leaning, no lying on it.” Slap—pink label.
“You want the pillow? Fine, the sofa’s mine.” Slap—blue label.
“Go herniate your lumbar disc. The solid wood chair is essential for back health.” Slap—pink label.
“Table usage rights are mine. You can bend over to eat!” Slap—blue label.
“Heh, we’re only eating takeout in the room. Hug your takeout and cry—the sink’s mine. You can use a basin to wash your face.” Pink label.
“Showerhead’s mine.” Blue label.
“I knew you’d grab it, so I brought my own. Take it off after I shower!” Yu Xi pulled a showerhead and hose from his bag. His gaze shifted to the bed covered in “early birth of a healthy baby” decorations. “How do we split the bed?”
Yi Chen pulled out a measuring tape from his bag: “Good thing I came prepared.”
In the control room watching the monitors, the director: “…”
Also in the control room watching the feed: Guan Zifan and Yi Chen’s manager, Lin Yun: “…”
Lin Yun covered her face. “Sorry, you had to see that.”
Guan Zifan: “Mutual… mutual…”
Just half an hour earlier, Lin Yun and Guan Zifan had met at a coffee shop.
Lin Yun lived up to her ace manager reputation. After brief pleasantries, she got straight to business and pulled out a business plan.
“After seeing the preview period, the company higher-ups want Yi Chen and Yu Xi to do some official CP promotion. This is a draft plan. I’d appreciate it if you could take a look when you have time.”
Guan Zifan took the plan but didn’t open it. “Have you discussed this with Yi Chen? What’s his stance?”
“Not yet,” Lin Yun replied. “Since it’s collaborative promotion, I need to check with our partner first before moving forward.”
Guan Zifan nodded.
He’d had a pretty good idea of what she wanted when Lin Yun asked to meet privately.
They ran in the same circles—no eternal enemies, but eternal interests.
Clearly, both their companies saw the value in CP promotion.
But Guan Zifan didn’t agree right away. “To be honest, a few days ago I floated the idea to Yu Xi, but he turned it down. I think we need some time to work out the kinks.”
“I understand,” Lin Yun said. “I’ll need to do some convincing with Yi Chen when I get back too.”
Their talk was straightforward, no beating around the bush. Once they understood each other, they shook hands and returned to the set.
Then, the managers who’d just negotiated a smooth CP collab watched as Yu Xi and Yi Chen sprawled on the bed, measuring lengths with a tape to divide territories—precise down to the millimeter.
Yu Xi: “Why do you have an extra 1.1 centimeters? Move back?”
Yi Chen: “Let go! You pushed it back 1.5 centimeters. Was that on purpose?”
Lin Yun and Guan Zifan: “…”
Bullet comments: 【Hahahahaha!】
【I’m dying of laughter!】
【Like when I was a kid dividing territory with my little brother hahahaha!】
【So childish, but I love it hahaha!!】
After the hyper-precise territory division, Yu Xi and Yi Chen each claimed 0.9 meters of bed space. They placed their personal items in their zones, turning a 40-square-meter room into two independent 20-square-meter areas. Only then did they strut out contentedly to the gathering spot.
The homestay the production team booked was a ring of courtyard houses with a big central yard. By the time everyone gathered, the crew had set up a stove and dining table.
The first task of the first episode of Where to Go This Weekend: fend for your own lunch.
“Lunch?” Wu Zhiqi asked. “Where’s the food?”
“Is there a fresh market around? I’ll go buy some,” Fang Peng offered.
Fu Le frowned slightly. “But I don’t know how to cook… Can I mooch a bit? I don’t eat much.”
“No fresh market,” the host said, stepping aside to reveal the view behind him. “You’ll have to find ingredients yourselves.”
Cloud Mist Mountain was in K City X Village. Though it had plenty of homestays, the surrounding area retained vast rural scenery: vegetable plots, chicken coops and duck pens, rivers and streams, fish ponds, farmland, and a generous slab of beef sponsored by the locals.
Fang Peng sprang into action first. He rolled up his sleeves and pant legs. “I’ll head out then—grab some chickens, ducks, and eggs.”
“Dreamy!” Wu Zhiqi pulled Wen Yimeng over. “Let’s go catch some fish, yeah?”
“No.” Wen Yimeng shook off his hand and headed back to his room. “I brought my own food. Figure out lunch yourselves.”
The mood turned awkward for a moment.
“I’ll handle the cooking,” Yi Chen broke the ice. “It might not be great—make do. These bowls and chopsticks look like they haven’t been used in ages. I’ll rinse them off.”
“No worries!” Wu Zhiqi, stung by Wen Yimeng’s rejection, looked a bit down but bounced back quickly. “As long as it’s edible. I’ll go catch fish! Fingers crossed!”
Fu Le looked troubled. “But I don’t know how… Yi Chen-ge, can I help you wash the dishes?”
Before Yi Chen could respond, Fu Le sidled up to him, grabbed a small stool, and started walking while glancing back. “Hey, Yu Xi, what are you planning to do? No freeloading—everyone’s watching! How about we both help Yi Chen-ge?”
Yu Xi ignored Fu Le, borrowed a set of knives from a local, and tested the blades with two of them.
The razor-sharp edges clinked with a shrill, clear ring.
Yu Xi donned an apron, placed the massive slab of beef on the chopping block, and gripped a knife in each hand. “I’ll butcher the meat.”
Fu Le turned his head.
This was the perfect chance to play up his delicate young master persona. Yu Xi was an idiot for picking the ugliest job—chopping meat was so crude, splattering him with blood and guts. It’d make Fu Le look even more pristine and dainty by comparison.
Fu Le’s hand “slipped,” shattering a bowl. “Sorry, Yi Chen-ge. I never wash dishes at home…”
“It’s fine,” Yi Chen said. “Be careful.”
“Mm-hm!” Fu Le nodded, reaching for the shards. A rough, jagged piece sliced his “delicate” finger. “Ahh…”
“It hurts so much…”
Getting hurt would maximize fan concern—and Yi Chen’s attention.
【Wuwuwu, my baby Lele.】
【Be more careful!】
【Mommy blow it away, pain pain fly fly.】
【So heartbreaking. Lele crying is too pitiful!】
“Yi Chen-ge…” Fu Le whined pitifully. “I got hurt…”
Yi Chen casually handed him a Band-Aid.
Fu Le took it delightedly and stuck it on the tiny cut. “Thanks, Yi Chen-ge! I’ll be fine soon!”
“That little scratch? Yell a few more times and it’ll heal,” Yu Xi said, nearly gagging at Fu Le’s cutesy tone.
“You’re an Alpha—you wouldn’t get it. Omegas can get infections easily from injuries… Yu Xi-ge, can’t you show some concern…”
Chop!!
Yu Xi didn’t even glance at Fu Le. He targeted the tendons and bone precisely—one swift, accurate, ruthless strike severed a chunk of meat. Blood splattered onto his apron.
Fu Le ignored him and turned away, muttering softly, “Butcher Alpha—reeks. Yi Chen-ge, you’re the best. Your pheromones smell so nice.”
Chop!!!
Yi Chen felt a chill down his back.
Yi Chen: “Don’t talk nonsense! I have five layers of blocker patches, blocker spray before leaving, and a daily suppressant shot. There’s no way you can smell my pheromones!”
Fu Le: “…”
“Must be your laundry detergent then. I love it—is it gardenia?”
Chop!!
Chop!!
“So noisy,” Yu Xi said, lifting a chunk of meat as blood dripped from the raw flesh.
Yi Chen’s dishwashing speed increased 1.5x.
“Washing dishes is so tiring… I’m worried about my hands. I heard detergent makes them rough. Yi Chen-ge, got any hand cream to recommend?”
Chop!!
Yi Chen’s dishwashing speed x2.
Fu Le lowered his lashes, face flushing. “Yi Chen-ge, actually, there’s something I’ve always wanted a chance to say…”
Chop!!!
Yi Chen’s dishwashing speed x2.5.
Fu Le felt a bit sad—Yu Xi kept interrupting him.
Luckily, Yi Chen didn’t like Yu Xi much either. A little stoking, and he’d boot Yu Xi out of their shared screen time and space.
“Yu Xi’s so noisy, Yi Chen-ge. We could be washing quietly…”
Chop chop chop chop chop—!!!!
Yu Xi drew the other knife. “Folks, how about dumplings tonight? I’ll chop the filling.”
Chop chop chop chop chop—
Chop chop chop chop chop—
Chop chop chop chop chop—
Chop chop chop chop chop—
Yi Chen’s dishwashing speed x3.
x4.
x5.
x6.
By the time the stunned Fu Le turned around, Yi Chen’s hands were a blur, growing more frantic amid the chopping—finishing an entire basin of dishes at a jaw-dropping speed.
Fu Le gaped. “Yi Chen-ge, you…”
Clang!
Yu Xi halted his chopping, slammed one knife into the wooden block. His bloodstained apron was flecked with meat bits. He gripped one knife and hefted an iron basin, banging it hard against the block with a deafening clang.
Yu Xi: “How long are you gonna chat? Get over here!!”
Yi Chen jolted.
Fu Le: “?”
“You’re way too bossy! Yi Chen-ge’s a gentleman and won’t stoop to your level, but I can’t take it!” Fu Le turned to comfort Yi Chen. “Yi Chen-ge, ignore him. I…”
Before he finished, Yi Chen grabbed the basin of dishes and his stool and bolted.
As he walked away, he called back to Fu Le: “Y-you-you, stay away from me from now on! Talk business, no chit-chat. Call me by name—no ‘ge.’ Band-Aids are one per, WeChat pay supported. Pay the local for that bowl you broke!”
Fu Le: “…”
