[Side Quest Four Failed! Reason for failure: Any action that damages the Male Lead’s image results in failure, no matter how excellently executed!]
Lin Zhi, who had been secretly smug while holding Song Mian’s clothes, was completely dumbfounded.
After reporting the completion, the Romance Survival System’s electronic voice chimed in with shock: [This system has never encountered a situation like this before! Host, this quest really is strict.]
Lin Zhi looked down at the clothes in his hands. “All for nothing?”
The Romance Survival System analyzed rationally: [Yes! Please return them. You’ve stolen all his clothes—what, did you want the Male Lead to yell for someone to bring him new ones, or strut out naked? Host, you seriously damaged the Male Lead’s proud image.]
Lin Zhi hadn’t considered any of that.
Zhu Muyun was stunned too. “Zhi Zhi, did you see some rare pajamas online that boost masculinity or something?”
Lin Zhi’s face turned ashen. “No.”
Tong Xu finally noticed the commotion between Lin Zhi and Zhu Muyun. He turned off his mic in disbelief. “Lin Zhi, you pervert.”
Lin Zhi looked up. “No.”
Lin Zhi neatly placed Song Mian’s clothes on Song Mian’s bed. Then he opened Song Mian’s wardrobe and pulled out a set of thick winter pajamas. To his two dumbfounded roommates, he said, “I just wanted Song Mian to stay warm.”
Tong Xu: “You okay? It’s already twenty degrees outside.”
Zhu Muyun: “I’m starting to not understand you at all.”
Lin Zhi didn’t understand himself either.
He hugged the thick pajamas but didn’t touch Song Mian’s underwear or towel. The bathroom door wasn’t locked this time. Lin Zhi gently turned the knob and sneaked back in. The moment he entered, Song Mian’s amused, laughing voice rang out. “Stealing my clothes?”
Lin Zhi laughed awkwardly. “Your pajamas are too thin. I swapped them for a thicker set.”
Song Mian: “…”
Lin Zhi boldly placed the pajamas nearby and slunk out dejectedly.
Moments later, Song Mian emerged in the black, thick pajamas. The dorm fell into an oddly quiet atmosphere. Song Mian glanced at Lin Zhi, who was obediently sitting in his chair, his gaze even more complex.
Lin Zhi didn’t wait for Song Mian to settle the score. Instead, when Song Mian was blow-drying his hair, he cheekily went over and punched Song Mian’s chest. Song Mian immediately turned off the hairdryer. Lin Zhi forced a playful grin. “Warm enough?”
Song Mian was utterly speechless and gave Lin Zhi no face at all. “Couple’s pajamas? Out of the entire dorm, just the two of us wearing this kind.”
Lin Zhi froze.
Song Mian turned the hairdryer back on. The roaring sound made Lin Zhi suffer immensely.
Song Mian, why would he think that?! Lin Zhi hadn’t even considered couple’s pajamas. He really was a scheming gay now!
But arguing was pointless. His quest hadn’t succeeded anyway.
Lin Zhi walked away dejectedly.
On Tuesday, Lin Zhi behaved himself all day.
That evening, while Song Mian was showering, Lin Zhi sneaked in again. The water stopped the instant he entered.
“Lin Zhi.”
He’d been caught. Even stealing clothes got him busted, so the quest was doomed. Lin Zhi quickly retreated. Zhu Muyun couldn’t stand it anymore. “Zhi Zhi, give me back my key.”
Lin Zhi refused.
In his mind, he vented passively to the Romance Survival System: “He spots me the second I go in. I can’t complete this quest. Big Fierce Top, am I stuck in an infinite death loop?”
With the host feeling down, the Romance Survival System seriously analyzed for its dumb host: [That’s because the Male Lead heard the key turning. If he doesn’t lock the door, you might not get caught! As long as he doesn’t spot you stealing and doesn’t know what you’re taking, the ‘stealing’ step passes!]
Lin Zhi still thought it was tough.
Soon, Song Mian finished showering and came out. He knocked on Lin Zhi’s bunk. Lin Zhi poked his head out with a guilty smile. “Brother Song Mian, what’s up?”
Song Mian’s lips twitched. “What’d you go in there for?”
With his mind blank, Lin Zhi still mustered a lie. “To see if you needed any help.”
This was the simp’s professional instinct.
Song Mian raised an eyebrow and scoffed. “Your excuses are getting more lame.”
Lin Zhi weakly shrank back. Luckily, though Song Mian’s words were blunt, he didn’t press the issue. But—
How was he supposed to negotiate with Song Mian to not lock the door while showering? Lin Zhi decided to heed the system’s advice.
On the third evening, Lin Zhi blocked the bathroom doorway just as Song Mian was about to enter.
Song Mian looked at him leisurely. “What now?”
Lin Zhi scratched his butt.
Song Mian’s attitude wasn’t great. “Stop scratching your ass. Spit it out.”
Lin Zhi pleaded with puppy-dog eyes. “C-can you not lock the door when you shower?”
This was breaking the jar—just go all in. Since his straight-guy image was already suspect, might as well be shameless.
Song Mian’s eyes flickered.
Lin Zhi’s face scrunched up like a seal’s. “I know this request is kinda weird, but don’t overthink it? Just… don’t lock it?”
Song Mian hooked the corner of his lips, his gaze deepening. “Fine.”
Lin Zhi blinked.
He… agreed just like that?
Song Mian: “Don’t block the door.”
Lin Zhi stepped aside. After watching Song Mian enter the bathroom, he pressed his ear against it. Sure enough, no locking sound.
Lin Zhi’s eyes lit up. He actually had a bunch of backup excuses ready.
Song Mian truly was his “cold-faced but warm-hearted” bro, “sharp-tongued with a soft heart”—indulging even a possible gay like him.
Zhu Muyun urged: “Can I have my key back now?”
Lin Zhi pretended not to hear. He squatted by the bathroom door. After the water started running—about three minutes in—he gently turned the knob.
Without the key’s click, it was much quieter.
The bathroom door was slightly ajar. The water pattered steadily behind the frosted glass, unchanged.
Lin Zhi was thrilled.
He crept to the cabinet, head down, reaching for Song Mian’s shirt. Suddenly, his collar was yanked from behind.
Lin Zhi panicked.
The water still ran inside, but Lin Zhi was pinned against the glass door. Song Mian’s low, amused voice whispered in his ear: “Ever heard of luring someone into a trap?”
Lin Zhi: “…”
He’d been played!
Lin Zhi silently raised his hands. “Brother Song Mian, I surrender.”
Song Mian kept gripping Lin Zhi’s collar, his breath circling Lin Zhi’s ear. “So, what’re you stealing my clothes for?”
Song Mian’s voice carried a hint of mischief.
Lin Zhi figured it was fair play. If he’d caught Song Mian stealing his clothes red-handed, he’d mock him for life.
Pasted against the glass, Lin Zhi’s legs went weak. He stammered submissively: “J-just a joke.”
Song Mian murmured almost inaudibly: “Three days in a row breaking into my bathroom, and it’s just a ‘joke’?”
It really was just a joke that simple.
“Big Fierce Top, help me explain!”
The A9901 system stayed silent, having found a spot to quietly spectate.
Lin Zhi changed the subject himself: “Brother Song Mian, y-you’re not wearing clothes, right?”
Song Mian scoffed. “Don’t you know best where they are?”
Lin Zhi felt guilty. “Isn’t it kinda inappropriate chatting like this? How about letting me go first?”
Song Mian released his collar.
The surrendering soldier instantly dropped his hands and turned away. Lin Zhi’s gaze fixed on Song Mian’s upper body. He had to admit, Song Mian’s physique was impressive. Enviously, he said, “Brother Song Mian, can you take me along when you work out?”
Song Mian arched a brow. “Changing the subject?”
Lin Zhi deflated.
No, he was sincere.
But—
Unconsciously, Lin Zhi’s eyes drifted downward.
“Holy crap?” Lin Zhi’s eyes widened. So… so… His eyes brimmed with pure envy.
“So that’s why you’ve been barging into my bathroom three days straight?”
Lin Zhi jolted, finally looking up—too late. Song Mian leaned against the glass door, gazing down at him with a half-smile.
Lin Zhi… was utterly doomed.
