Chapter 68: Diagnosis Part 3

Dai Linxuan tugged at his collar, but the suffocating feeling didn’t ease. He asked softly, “Are they all from things he experienced as a child?”

“His childhood experiences are etched into his bones. Whether painful or not, he can’t shake them off.” Ye Qingyun sighed. “The delusions are mostly about you.”

Dai Linxuan said hoarsely, “I wonder if I didn’t care enough… I’ve never noticed any of this…”

“No need for self-blame. Lai Li is a patient with extremely strong self-management skills—that’s good news.” Ye Qingyun smiled. “Even if most of his life is spent in symptomatic states, unable to distinguish dreams, reality, or delusions, he ignores them all, treating them as dreams or hallucinations. He doesn’t mention or dwell on them. It’s like dragging miscellaneous files to the recycle bin—you know they’re there, but as long as you don’t open them, you forget.”

“…Pretty domineering.”

“It’s a good thing.” As an expert, Ye Qingyun found it fascinating. “In our interactions, he struck me as an extreme ‘solipsist.’ Even during breakfast just now, he might have felt it was a dream from last night he hadn’t woken from, and everything around was hallucination or delusion—

“But he doesn’t mind, as long as he can see you, feel the warmth of your skin, taste the food, and know his mind is working. To him, even if the surroundings are false, they’re real.”

Dai Linxuan tugged at his lips, amused and helpless. “The world turns when his eyes are open; it ceases when they’re closed?”

Ye Qingyun snapped her fingers. “Similar logic.”

Dai Linxuan: “…”

A true emperor.

Ye Qingyun said, “His condition is lifelong; it can only be managed. Memories already in the recycle bin might not all be retrievable, and there could be short-term episodes like before. Be prepared.”

“It’s fine…” Dai Linxuan zoned out for a moment, then looked at the doctor. “He recognizes people and doesn’t confuse events, so memory loss doesn’t impact his life much, right? The hallucinations are what matter.”

“They’re interconnected; improvement in one helps the others… Oh, right.”

Ye Qingyun pointed at the diagnosis report in Dai Linxuan’s hand. “There’s one diagnosis I didn’t include. It didn’t show on the scales, but I think he did it on purpose. Pay a little attention to it.”

Thanks to Lai Li’s formerly vigorous energy and frequent exercise, his body recovered quickly. A week after waking, he could move freely, though still a bit gaunt.

Hearing approaching footsteps, Lai Li asked, “Where are my passport and phone?”

Dai Linxuan cupped his face and kissed him from behind in a half-embrace.

Lai Li neither struggled nor responded.

He had searched the entire villa while Dai Linxuan slept at night and found no sign of his documents.

When the kiss ended, Dai Linxuan pecked from his nose tip to his eye corner and forehead. “The doctor said hospitalization might work better.”

Lai Li stared at him.

“But I refused.” Dai Linxuan chuckled. “I told her I might not be able to leave you.”

Lai Li’s face darkened. “Why did you let her know—”

Dai Linxuan covered his mouth. “Just kidding. I just said I wouldn’t feel at ease with you hospitalized.”

In truth, Doctor Ye’s original words were that the sea island was ideal for treatment—meds plus therapy could yield twice the results with half the effort. Before the accident, Dai Linxuan had considered it.

“I used your passport for some procedures.” Dai Linxuan pulled out several English-filled documents, all flipped to the last page. “Sign here.”

Lai Li narrowed his eyes. “What are they?”

Dai Linxuan said, “Relax, not voluntary hospitalization agreements.”

Lai Li knew his brother wouldn’t dare force him now.

“Why not let me read them?”

Dai Linxuan’s gaze darkened. “You never looked before. Now you don’t trust…”

Before he finished, Lai Li snatched the pen and signed his name with heavy, deliberate strokes. On the last one, he slammed the pen down with a bang.

He was pissed.

“These three are sea island transfer contracts—remember to wire me some money for the records. These two are birthday gifts.” Dai Linxuan quirked his lips. “Afraid you’d spoil the surprise if you read them, so I prepared something else. Otherwise, I’d be out of ideas.”

Lai Li’s displeasure eased somewhat.

Dai Linxuan rubbed his chin. “Plane picks us up in two hours.”

Lai Li grabbed his hand immediately. “Back home?”

Dai Linxuan hummed. “Back to the house. We’ll land just in time for dinner. Xiao Yi’s been worried about you.”

Lai Li scoffed, unconcerned.

Dai Linxuan pulled him up. “We have no luggage to pack. Shall we walk to the helipad? Enjoy the scenery.”

Lai Li had no objections.

The former island owner had built a large helipad, about half an hour’s walk from the mountain villa. Everyone else had gone ahead by car; only they strolled behind, taking in the island’s every blade of grass and tree.

Dai Linxuan gazed into the distance with some regret. “Who knows when we’ll come back.”

Lai Li thought for a moment. “We can vacation here for New Year.”

Dai Linxuan chuckled lightly. “Don’t give the old man a heart attack.”

“Better if he drops dead.” Lai Li felt disgusted just thinking of the old man. “You don’t like him anymore. Why keep up the pretense?”

Dai Linxuan said, “Wait a bit longer. Get the shares first.”

Lai Li glanced at him but said no more.

Dai Linxuan felt his hand gripped; he looked down—

Lai Li had taken the initiative, interlocking their fingers and tucking them into his pocket.

Dai Linxuan looked for a moment, a smile playing on his lips as he continued walking forward. “When we’re old, maybe we can live here long-term. After we die, we can just scatter our ashes into the sea.”

“No.” Lai Li couldn’t accept that. His brows furrowed tightly. “You’d get washed all over the place by the seawater… and you might even end up in a fish’s belly…”

It would be better if he ate him instead.

Lai Li didn’t say that out loud, afraid of scaring his brother.

“Then we’ll be buried on the island?” Dai Linxuan hummed thoughtfully. “The little garden next to the villa would be nice. We can modify it then, build two graves right next to each other…”

“Put us in one grave.”

Lai Li was determined to die one step after Dai Linxuan. He would eat Dai Linxuan’s ashes, then go into the incinerator to be burned into ashes himself, and they would be buried together.

Or he could place his brother’s intact body in the grave, lie down beside him, have someone seal the coffin lid from outside, and hold his brother as he quietly experienced death, which wasn’t scary at all.

It would be best not to engrave names on the tombstone. If it were ever dug up, it might bring criticism from future generations onto his brother.

Lai Li licked his lips, his mood brightened considerably by the hypothesis of a century from now.

Dai Linxuan also laughed for a good while. “Then let’s just put us in one urn.”

Lai Li hummed in agreement. “That works.”

Dai Linxuan had only said it casually to tease Lai Li, but as he gazed at the shimmering sea, a softness inexplicably welled up in his heart, and his eyes grew tender.

Lai Li watched him, his heart stirring.

In the distance, under the blue sky, a private plane streaked by, leaving a long white trail.

Dai Linxuan tugged his hand. “Come on, let’s go home.”

Lai Li stopped in his tracks, standing still without letting go of his hand.

Dai Linxuan turned back questioningly. “What? Can’t bear to leave?”

Lai Li shook his head and looked at him for a long time.

Dai Linxuan was bathed in sunlight at that moment, his figure ethereal and elusive, just like the day he had carried Lai Li out of the Slum District. The sunlight had been brilliant that day, blindingly dreamlike.

Dai Linxuan asked with amusement, “Is there something on my face…”

“Brother.”

“Hm?”

Lai Li said, “I love you.”

Dai Linxuan froze as if turned to stone for several seconds. The smile at the corner of his mouth neither deepened nor faded.

It wasn’t until Lai Li called out “Brother” with furrowed brows that he snapped out of it like waking from a dream. He pulled Lai Li into his arms, smiling as he started to speak. “How…”

His voice was a little hoarse. He cleared his throat and continued, “How come you said that so suddenly?”

Lai Li was displeased by his reaction. “I said it because I wanted to. Do I need to pick an auspicious day? Or prepare a ring? I’ll make it up to you when we get back…”

Dai Linxuan raised his hand to cover Lai Li’s eyes and coaxed him in a low voice. “Say it again.”

Lai Li paused, grabbed his wrist, and softened his tone a bit. “Brother, I love you.”

Dai Linxuan’s fingertips curled involuntarily. He wrapped an arm around Lai Li’s waist, cradled the back of his neck with the other hand, and pulled him close, closing his eyes deeply.

A moment later, he spat out a true heart stained with sin and blood. “I love you.”