Cthulhu Investigator with Maxed-Out Charisma

Ode Douglas was an outstanding graduate of Mida University’s Department of Political Science.

Due to certain *unspeakable* reasons, he tragically missed the government job interview and wound up… as an agent investigator.

Thanks to those same unspeakable reasons, Ode—clutching his waist—said bluntly, “…With all due respect, my career goal was a civil service desk job.”

“If you’d bothered to glance at my resume, you’d know my phys ed grades were a disaster.”

“Me? An agent? …Does the position come with a free gravesite?”

The bureau chief who had exceptionally recruited him—a cigar clenched between his teeth—shot back, “You think the screening officer flagged you because of your long legs?”

“You possess a Charm Value that blows past the limits. Against those monsters, you won’t break a sweat physically. Play to your professional strengths: deception, concealment, persuasion, enchantment.”

Ode thought: …And those are political science majors?

…Probably.

Still reeling from his latest undeniable feat—a marriage scam turned great escape—Ode patted his penniless pockets and grudgingly strapped on his holster. And so began his odyssey of trickery… or rather, political persuasion.

Thus unfolded his exploits.

In uncharted waters, Ode stood bare-chested atop the deck, the Thorn Crown—personally bestowed by Cthulhu himself—adorning his brow. His hands gripped the helm fiercely as he slammed the massive ship’s prow, inscribed with Covenant Inscriptions, into the Lord of R’lyeh rising from the depths!

#Unlucky Ex-Husband +1#

Sunken in blood and quicksand within the Black Pharaoh Pyramid.

Clad solely in diaphanous white gauze, Ode smiled from behind the altar, welcoming the Revelry Outer God’s lavish and imperious Avatar as it strode forth. Then he tore the Covenant Inscriptions from the altar itself!

#Unlucky Ex-Husband +2#

Stranded in a space-time rift, inside the Broadway Theater.

Ode held a golden goblet between his teeth and fed wine laced with [Order Brew] into the mouth of a bewildered, frozen devotee.

At the instant the King in Yellow descended into their vessel, Ode drew the piercing gaze of the Supreme Chaos God’s Avatar!

#Unlucky Ex-Husband +3#

His work perpetually danced on the knife’s edge of life and death, but Ode grew ever more adept, even savoring the thrill now and then. Until one day, a knock echoed at his hideout’s door—from someone… or something.

Good news! His dead or trapped ex-husbands had come calling!

Better news: There was more than one.

Ode: “…………”

So the question remained: How to dispatch… ahem, send off this horde of vengeance-seeking gods? Urgent answers needed!