And that little thing was right now in front of him, enthusiastically playing a bamboo leaf, openly currying his favor, asking him to appreciate it.
Did Gu Jinyu also watch Gu Xiaodeng like those others did?
If so, then taking the thing Gu Jinyu had set his sights on and pulling it towards himself… that would be a very interesting affair.
“I’m done!” Gu Xiaodeng finished his cheerful country tune, rubbing the bamboo leaf with a mix of happiness and melancholy. “How nice. I can also do things that aren’t quite allowed here at Young Master Su’s place.”
Su Mingya said gently, “If you ever need a safe harbor in the future, come and find me here.”
Gu Xiaodeng’s smile faltered. Inopportunely, he thought of what Feng’en had told him that morning—that talk of “climbing up” and “sliding down.” He shouldn’t be thinking of that in the face of Su Mingya’s kindness.
He felt Young Master Su was an otherworldly, noble figure above worldly dust, someone who shouldn’t be categorized within a hierarchy of status.
He wanted to be friends with Young Master Su—like an immortal and a mortal who admired the immortal. He didn’t want the kind of patron-protégé relationship defined by status.
Once Gu Xiaodeng figured this out, he smiled again. “The days at the Academy are still long! When I’m lonely in the future, I’ll come and visit Young Master Su.”
Su Mingya gave a soft laugh, patiently awaiting his next visit. “Alright.”
~
Gu Xiaodeng jogged all the way back to his quarters. He was still wearing the new white robes Su Mingya had given him, his own outfit with the Restraint Pendant bundled in his arms. Without that pendant, he could run freely with abandon.
As soon as he entered, Feng’en gave him an odd look. “Gongzi, did you have your midday meal?”
“I ate. I’m very full.” Gu Xiaodeng shook the clothes in his arms. “I ate at Young Master Su’s place. The rules there are strict, so they changed my clothes. Feng’en, can you remove the Restraint Pendant from this outfit? I have martial arts class this afternoon…”
“You ate at his place?”
A clear, cold voice came suddenly from behind him. Gu Xiaodeng jumped in fright, whipping his head around to see Gu Jinyu leaning against the doorframe of the inner room, tilting his head to look at him. His shoulder-length hair stirred lightly in the breeze. He presented a strikingly different kind of handsome spirit compared to Su Mingya.
Gu Xiaodeng was overjoyed. “Aiyah! Why are you here!”
Before Gu Jinyu could speak, Gu Xiaodeng happily ran up to him, his mouth launching into a barrage of chatter. “You didn’t go back to West Prosperity Garden? Did you eat? You really are good at scaring people, just like this morning, suddenly appearing behind me. Oh right, did your three months in the Outer State go smoothly? This morning, listening to you discuss all those military and governance decrees gave me the creeps!”
Gu Jinyu listened for a moment before finding it noisy. He waved Feng’en away, turned, and walked into the inner room, sitting down by the window. Gu Xiaodeng pattered after him, not even putting down his clothes before sitting beside him.
Gu Jinyu interrupted his rambling. “Yunji told me you were beaten yesterday. Did it hurt?”
“It’s alright, it’s alright.” Gu Xiaodeng folded the clothes on his lap, smiling as he reached back to touch his spine. “Honestly, that little bit of pain is nothing. I have Feng’en and Feng Huan stretching my bones every day. That body conditioning is the truly painful part. After all this time, I still find it painful. Maybe I’ve gotten somewhat desensitized to this kind of pain. I was always thick-skinned before, and now I’m even tougher.”
“You? Thick-skinned?”
“Yep.” Gu Xiaodeng jumped topics, bringing his palms together to frame his forehead. “Jinyu, we haven’t seen each other for so long. Look, did I get taller? After all that bone stretching! I’m still not as tall as you, but I’ve shot up a bit. Quick, praise me!”
Gu Jinyu looked at him for a moment, then raised a hand and covered his head. “You did get taller.”
Gu Xiaodeng’s mood soared. “Will you join in during my afternoon classes, like you did this morning?”
“I’ll be returning to West Prosperity Garden in a bit,” Gu Jinyu withdrew his hand. “Royal Father has matters for me.”
Gu Xiaodeng’s smile froze. First, he wilted, then quickly rallied. “Then let’s chat a lot more! We haven’t seen each other for so long. I didn’t even know you went to the Outer State. It’s been over three months. Did you fare well out there? Your hair is shorter. Was it cut short in battle?”
“…You’re always strangely perceptive about the oddest things.” Gu Jinyu lifted a hand to fiddle with the ends of his short ponytail. “I nearly had my head cut off at one point.”
Gu Xiaodeng was stunned. “That dangerous! Thank heavens, your head is still in one piece.”
Gu Jinyu didn’t explain that the one who nearly cut it was Gu Pinghan.
During this trip to the Outer State, he had encountered people from the martial world who were inextricably linked to Gu Xiaodeng’s adoptive father. Zhang Dengqing had been taken away by them.
And at that time, with reckless audacity, he had tried to leave the Gu family and return to the martial world where he originally belonged.
Unfortunately, he hadn’t brought Northern Gaze, the thousand-li horse kept at the Gu household. He rode an ordinary military horse. After barely three days of running, it died of exhaustion.
He lowered his hand, turned his head to look at the bright-eyed Gu Xiaodeng, and abruptly, quietly, asked him: “What was my birth mother like?”
Gu Xiaodeng’s eyes were exceptionally bright. He didn’t find the question abrupt at all. He just glanced outside, then leaned close to Gu Jinyu’s ear and spoke in a breathy whisper. “Oh heavens, I’ve waited so long. You’re finally willing to ask me about your birth parents.”
Gu Jinyu lowered his eyes and smiled. “Didn’t you say you’ve forgotten all memories before the age of seven?”
“Last year, when I was locked in the Confinement Tower, I saw her in a dream.” Gu Xiaodeng spoke carefully and softly to him. “She was a foodie who would cry when she wanted to cry and laugh when she wanted to laugh. I even suspect the reason she hid in the Gu family back then might have been because the Gu family’s cooking was too delicious. She hid here and stole tasty food every day.”
Gu Jinyu smiled again. “I see… What about my birth father?”
“Him, I really don’t know. My adoptive father never told me either.” Gu Xiaodeng poked his arm. “But just look at the way you turned out. Good face, good figure. You pick up anything fast and have a talent for everything you do. Your birth father must have been a good-looking and powerful man from the martial world. Shouldn’t be too hard to find.”
“Judgment without any basis.” Gu Jinyu lifted a foot onto the chair in front of him, resting his elbow on his knee in a somewhat dissolute posture. “Your Royal Father and Mother Consort are both capable people. You don’t resemble them. White silk in black mud; it blackens with its surroundings. It has little to do with innate nature. What kind of environment produces what kind of person.”
Gu Xiaodeng had a flash of inspiration. “Wow, did you run into those martial world people who are tied up with us in the Outer State?”
Gu Jinyu raised his eyes to look at him, thinking of the nighttime conversation before Zhang Dengqing was taken away.
[Don’t tell Xiaodeng I was taken. Just say I’m serving in Gu Pinghan’s military camp. He’s already so worried about me.]
[I know the Gu family isn’t suited for him. But look, the grudges of the martial world are just as perilous as the dangers within your noble houses. I can go back to the martial world, but Xiaodeng can’t. He just barely managed to escape from there. He’s still so young. No matter how bad the Gu family is, it’s better than the place he lived before he was seven.]
[Gu Jinyu, you will never know what kind of life Xiaodeng led before he was seven. Even he has forgotten it himself, but my father and I remember. That’s what our family owes him.]
[But in this world, the one who owes him the most is you. It can only be you.]
[What you must do in this life is to hold tightly onto this stolen life, keep climbing upwards, become a high official, and protect Xiaodeng.]
[Even if the blood of the martial world runs in your veins, there is no place for you there. You and Xiaodeng are the same. You can only wander in the crevice between the martial world and the court. You won’t find a second person in this world who shares your unique path.]
[Gu Jinyu, no one can endure being trapped in a narrow fissure their whole life. The next time you scheme against Xiaodeng, weigh it carefully.]
“Gu Jinyu? Say something.” Gu Xiaodeng nudged him. “Did you run into some strange characters from the martial world?”
Gu Jinyu came back to his senses and smiled lightly. “Just heard some rumors.”
“You’ve been holding it in for a long time, haven’t you?” Gu Xiaodeng poked his knee. “You can only talk to me about these things. If you weren’t so busy, I’d really want to chat with you for three days and three nights. I have so much I want to tell you.”
“Then let’s talk about the present. The past cannot be changed; the future still has room for adjustment.” Gu Jinyu lowered his head and lightly bumped his forehead. “Are things going smoothly for you at the Academy?”
“Half and half.” Gu Xiaodeng happily bumped him back. The two of them butted heads like fighting crickets. In this childish intimacy, he felt incredibly close. He babbled on about the frustrations he’d endured, his content now laced with humor.
Gu Jinyu said softly, “This is all a necessary path. Yesterday, I had Blossom Ashes bring you a hairpin. You can wear it often from now on…”
Gu Xiaodeng suddenly leaned right up to his face, carefully examining every detail. “Eh?”
Gu Jinyu lowered his head to look at him. “Hm?”
Gu Xiaodeng said seriously, “Gu Senqing, when you went to the Imperial Palace as a study companion, were you bullied too?”
His tone held no trace of doubt. He was always acutely perceptive, to the point of poignancy, in picking up on these subtle empathies. His face wore a childish expression that said, “If they bullied you, tell me, and I’ll help you curse them out.”
