That night, Gu Xiaodeng didn’t go back to have taro porridge with Feng’en and the others. Su Mingya had him stay over.
He was utterly shocked. “I… How could I possibly stay at Young Master Su’s place?”
“Why couldn’t you?” Su Mingya lifted a glazed cup to drink his medicine as calmly and elegantly as if sipping tea. “You’re so slender, and the Bamboo Courtyard is so large. With a little tidying, there’s space for you.”
Gu Xiaodeng scratched his head for a long while, rambling about all kinds of impropriety. Su Mingya answered each with the word “proper” — soft-spoken, but actually hard to refuse.
So Gu Xiaodeng didn’t press further. In the end, he obediently let Su Mingya’s servants lead him away to wash and tidy up. By the time he came out in sleepwear that fit him just right, other servants had already efficiently readied a side room for him to spend the night.
Su Mingya had also finished washing. Wearing a plain white inner robe, he sat at his desk with his hair half-loose. The two dark red bracelets around his left wrist showed with his movements. As Gu Xiaodeng had once said, even his wrist bones were beautiful.
“Xiaodeng, come here.”
Gu Xiaodeng hopped over on his sprained foot. Su Mingya gently patted the space beside him, telling him to sit closer. An attendant brought a case forward. Su Mingya opened it himself. Inside were twenty-five small compartments, each sealed with a tiny lid engraved with the name of a flower medicine — exquisite and lovely.
Gu Xiaodeng knew a thing or two about medicines. Looking at the flower medicine case, he made a few hissing sounds. “Young Master Su, what’s this for? These flower medicines are all very, very expensive.”
“Sit a little closer.” Su Mingya gave a light cough, took him by the wrist, and guided his hand to touch the medicine case. “This is just an ordinary thing. You’ll choose for yourself in a bit. Use these flower medicines to casually make a sachet. Tomorrow, if you go to class, tie the sachet to your waist. When others see it, they’ll naturally know you’re my ‘friend’ and won’t dare to bully you so wantonly anymore.”
Gu Xiaodeng froze. He heard him laugh softly. “I originally wanted to give you some Su family bracelets to wear on your wrist, like the Buddhist prayer beads or the ornamental coin I wear. But you once said you don’t like wearing accessories, that buckles on the wrist and things around the neck are too restrictive. So tie on a sachet instead. You should be able to accept this.”
The two were sitting close. The faint, bitter scent of Su Mingya lingered around him. Gu Xiaodeng’s ears grew warm, and the rims of his eyes ached. He reached out to gently stroke Su Mingya’s back to smooth his breathing, his nose stuffy as he said quietly, “Young Master Su still remembers my rambling words?”
“Not rambling.” Su Mingya placed a green sachet embroidered with the Su family crest into his hand and said warmly, “Pick some flower medicines you like, little one.”
Gu Xiaodeng’s nose stung. “I might not be younger than Young Master Su…”
“My birthday is the twenty-ninth of the first month, the end of mid-spring. I know we were born in the same year. Your birthdate is probably later than mine — even a few months makes me the elder.” Su Mingya lightly patted the back of his hand. “Even if your birthdate is before mine, in my eyes, being small in spirit means small. Xiaodeng is a child.”
Gu Xiaodeng couldn’t hold back his tears. A swell of grievance bubbled up, and he said whatever came to mind. “I also think I’m still small — a bean sprout, a little leek shoot. All I think about every day is three meals, two classes, a few brothers, friends, and family. Books I’ve read are easily forgotten, skills I’ve learned are easily grown rusty… I’m much more foolish than the ‘cousin siblings’ of the Gu family. Other than Fourth Young Master Jinyu, I can’t say much to anyone else.”
“The Gu family’s Prince and Princess Consort are capable. They’ve raised all of them to be little adults. I don’t fit in at all, but I thought that when I came to the academy, there would be dozens of boys my age. Surely some of them had to be real kids, right? Now, fine — whether there are real kids or not, I don’t know, but dead perverts sure aren’t few!”
“Thank goodness Young Master Su is a pure and clean refuge. I feel that no matter what, Young Master Su is transcendent and beyond the mundane.” Gu Xiaodeng looked at him with reddened eyes. “Thank you, Young Master Su, for still being willing to see me as a child. Other than you and Jinyu, I’m afraid no one else looks at me that way. You are both the very best of young masters.”
At the last sentence, Su Mingya’s eyelashes flickered. “You regard Jinyu with such special importance. Does he also treat you specially?”
Gu Xiaodeng nodded without stopping.
“How, specially?”
“The name Shanqing — he helped me pick it.”
The speaker was casual; the listener was immensely shocked.
“In the entire Gu family, he’s probably the only one who sincerely looks after me.” Some words Gu Xiaodeng had bottled up for a very long time — not the sort of thing to pour out to just anyone. But now Su Mingya hadn’t only sheltered him, he’d accepted him. So to Gu Xiaodeng, he was a flower of understanding, a grass that relieved worry — a great boss of beautiful looks and kind heart.
He lowered his head, touching the flower medicine case as he poured out his bitterness. “From the moment he saw me, the Prince thought I was an embarrassing thing. The Princess Consort treats me half kindly, half with contempt. The Second Young Lady thinks I’m rude and unseemly. The Heir thinks I bring disgrace to the family. The Little Young Master — tiny as he is — thinks I’m crude and vulgar. As for the others in the academy, Eldest Young Master Guan Yunji is the most typical. He thinks I drag down the Gu family’s foundation, that I’m a lowly speck of mud dirtying the Gu family, a sponge coming to soak up benefits…”
Su Mingya appreciated his dejected sorrow. Once Gu Xiaodeng had vented to the point of helpless, weary exhaustion, he spoke up at the right moment. “Compared to everyone in the academy, you care more about the Gu family’s attitude toward you, don’t you?”
Gu Xiaodeng nodded with some unease. “Mm!”
“If you want to attract the Gu family’s attention, why not imitate Jinyu?” As if discovering something amusing, Su Mingya thought of a game sure to thoroughly unsettle Gu Jinyu. “Your fourth elder cousin is blessed with fine looks — in that, you’re no worse than him. He is erudite, clever, quick-witted, skilled in both literary and martial arts. If you could become like him, you would surely gain the Gu family’s approval. You wouldn’t need to be nine-tenths like him — three-tenths would be enough.”
Contrary to his expectations, Gu Xiaodeng directly nodded in trust. The hand resting on the flower medicine case clenched into a small, indignant fist. “I think so too. If I could be even a few parts like Jinyu, the others in the academy wouldn’t just casually beat me up like they do now!”
Su Mingya found his naivety amusing, yet at the same time disliked how highly he affirmed Gu Jinyu.
It was just uncomfortable to hear.
“But where can I start learning from him?” Gu Xiaodeng shook his head and sighed. “And every day’s time is squeezed so full. Being myself is already hard enough. How could I be someone else?”
Su Mingya watched him for a moment. The interest in watching the show outweighed the displeasure in his heart. “You’ve hurt your foot now; you should avoid many martial arts classes as much as possible. When you’re free from class, come to the Bamboo Courtyard. Now you have quite a bit of time.”
Gu Xiaodeng’s eyes brightened. He lowered his gaze to look at this beauty under the lamplight, his star-like eyes burning brighter than the lamp flame. His heart stirred slightly. A thought flashed past.
Even if it wasn’t for any other purpose, simply keeping Gu Xiaodeng by his side to watch and enjoy seemed to be rather fine amusement.
And the world’s finest affairs often hatch from amusing diversions and evolve into their final form.
Gu Xiaodeng spent a peaceful night in the Bamboo Courtyard, utterly unaware that someone had spent an entire sleepless night because of him.
The next morning, with the flower medicine sachet tied at his waist and supported by a study servant, he dragged himself out of the Bamboo Courtyard.
Because of the bullying from the three or five invisible perverts at noon the day before, his foot had swollen more severely. Every ten hops, he wanted to rest a step. When Su Mingya got up that morning, he could see that Gu Xiaodeng’s complexion was bad from enduring the pain. He applied fine injury medicine and pain relief medication for him. Although Gu Xiaodeng knew the medicine’s effects were useless, his heart grew much warmer because of it.
Medicine couldn’t stop the pain, but happiness could.
Smiling brightly, he hopped along and chatted and laughed with Su Mingya on the same road. Not long after they left the Bamboo Courtyard, they ran into a group of students walking together on the road. Everyone’s expression upon seeing him was rather unpleasant, but they had to bow and greet Su Mingya, their smiles all strained.
For the first time in his life, Gu Xiaodeng experienced what “a dog relying on its master’s power” felt like. Though the phrase wasn’t good, he couldn’t find a more fitting idiom right then to describe his feelings — absurd yet helpless.
Fortunately, he could always find a unique way to console himself. He had successfully relied on Su Mingya’s power. This feeling could at most be summed up in one word: awesome!
