Chapter 15

Elementary school was not like kindergarten—life there wasn’t so simple and carefree. Elementary school had a slew of school rules; uniforms had to be worn, teachers were stricter, there was no dedicated playtime, and formal academic education began.

Chen Annan entered another completely new environment. Familiar companions had to be scattered and reassembled. Fortunately, it seemed the heavens also knew this kid was shy of strangers, as they actually placed his good kindergarten buddy, Xie Xi, into the same class.

Chen Annan had been in school for a week now, but the parent was still uneasy. The three of them walked towards the school gate. Lu Wenyuan held one kid’s head in each hand, cradling their heads as he admonished: “Cub, we agreed. You have to look out for each other at school. No fighting.”

Lu Qingyuan didn’t speak. Chen Annan’s delicate tendency to start crying the moment a fight broke out hadn’t shifted with time or changed with circumstances—he was impossibly hard to coax. He wouldn’t trouble himself for no reason.

Chen Annan, completely unaware someone was privately grumbling about him, intimately wrapped his arm around Uncle’s and said, “Don’t worry, don’t worry! I’ll take good care of Brother.”

Lu Wenyuan laughed and said, “You two must talk nicely if you have issues. You’re both the apples of my eye. If either of my darlings gets upset, it’ll break my heart.”

Chen Annan knew Uncle loved him. He couldn’t bear to make Uncle’s heart ache. So, when Lu Qingyuan sent him to his classroom, he tugged at Brother’s clothes and said very sensibly, “I’ll still wait for you on the playground after school, okay? Don’t forget about me.”

Lu Qingyuan had advanced to fifth grade this year and had one more class than Chen Annan in the afternoons. He placed the schoolbag he’d carried all the way onto Chen Annan’s seat and said, “I’ll remember. Just don’t go running around.”

Chen Annan obediently nodded, watching Brother leave the first-grade classroom. He then leaned on the windowsill, watching him disappear around the corner of the stairwell.

After Brother left, Chen Annan stopped talking. He quietly sat in his seat, watching the new classmates around him chattering and introducing themselves. He opened his pencil case and slowly rearranged the pencils in order of height.

The head teacher hadn’t entered the classroom yet at this point, so the children were especially lively. Chen Annan couldn’t blend in. Each time he faced a strange environment, it took him a long time to adapt. If someone approached him first, that was fine; if not, he would just honestly fiddle with his own things.

Thankfully, Xie Xi entered the class not long after. They were deskmates this semester. With a familiar companion by his side, Chen Annan wasn’t so afraid of socializing anymore, happily swaying about. When they went to the cafeteria for lunch, he even ate half a bowl of rice more.

Xie Xi, just as before, took special care of his little buddy, bringing him Oreos to eat.

Two familiar kids sitting together found it hard to be well-behaved. During class, Chen Annan listened intently to the teacher, while Xie Xi beside him chattered in his ear, whispering.

Chen Annan had the teacher’s voice in his left ear and Xie Xi’s rambling in his right. His brain simply couldn’t process both. He could only press his lips together and nudge Xie Xi with his elbow, signaling him to stop talking.

Xie Xi thought he was playing, so he nudged back with his elbow, using a bit too much force and knocking Chen Annan slightly off balance.

Chen Annan furrowed his small brows. The playful nature stirred up now, he deliberately poked Xie Xi back hard.

Xie Xi, unwilling to lose, reached out and slapped the back of Chen Annan’s hand. Without moving his eyes, Chen Annan extended his hand, groping around Xie Xi’s desk, wanting to slap back. But who knew Xie Xi would suddenly pull his hand away, making Chen Annan slap empty air.

The table resounded with a loud “Smack!”

Xie Xi snickered twice.

The two kids caused such a big commotion during class that the Math Teacher caught them red-handed. This teacher had laid down the rules at the very start of class, was very strict, and didn’t indulge children. Immediately slamming the book shut, she said impartially, “Chen Annan, Xie Xi, I’ve had my eye on you two for a long time! One class period is only 45 minutes. If each person wastes one minute, two people waste 90 minutes of others’ time! Go stand at the back of the room! Don’t hold up other people’s learning!”

Chen Annan had never been scolded so fiercely before. He jumped in fright. It took him a long moment to react. Under the teacher’s stern, sharp gaze, he obediently got up and stood at the back of the classroom.

Having just started school and already being seriously reprimanded by the teacher, Chen Annan, thin-skinned as he was, couldn’t bear it. His face burned hot to his ear tips. He didn’t dare move for the rest of the class, just kept his head low, body rigid, standing perfectly straight.

Even when the class-ending bell rang, he was still standing there with his head bowed. Only when the teacher told him to return did he shuffle back to his seat in tiny steps.

Chen Annan’s energy for the day plummeted to rock bottom. Dejected, he lay sprawled on his desk, his eyes wide and round. When Xie Xi asked if he wanted to get water, he didn’t speak.

Xie Xi very tactfully apologized. He shook his head and said, “It’s okay.”

Xie Xi watched his good friend bury his face into the crook of his arms and turn away, figuring he was feeling sad right now. So he took Chen Annan’s water bottle to go fill it for him.

Not wanting to trouble others, Chen Annan had no choice but to follow along, taking his water bottle back from Xie Xi’s hand. The two kids went together.

The school’s water fountain was at the end of the hallway, one on every floor. However, the drinking fountains for the lower grades were very low, specifically made for small children. But they were old, and the water would splash out; generally, you had to press the bottle mouth upwards against the tap.

Just as Chen Annan placed his bottle under the tap, a hand suddenly reached over from behind, supporting his wrist. A flat voice said, “Lift it higher, so it doesn’t splash.”

A familiar tone. Chen Annan whipped his head around and saw, to his surprise, Lu Qingyuan standing behind him. Brother was already much taller than him now. He reached out and directly took his water bottle, saying, “From now on, get hot water first, then add one-third cold water. It’ll be just right for drinking.”

Seeing Brother fill his water for him, Chen Annan obediently stepped aside. The heat on his face hadn’t faded yet, and he didn’t want to look up and let people see, so he kept his head bowed very low.

“If you can’t fill the water, wait for me to come after class. I’ll come by once every two classes,” Lu Qingyuan added.

Chen Annan’s voice was dejected: “Do you get water here too?”

“Mhm.” Lu Qingyuan handed his bottle back to him.

Hugging his cup, Chen Annan said glumly, “Thanks, Brother. I’ll go back now then.” Saying this, he and Xie Xi started walking back together.

The hallway bustled with playing children; their footsteps were drowned out in the cacophony of noise.

“Wait.” They hadn’t gone far when Lu Qingyuan suddenly spoke up, startling Chen Annan so much he trembled. The Math Teacher calling on him in the previous class had nearly given him psychological trauma.

Chen Annan turned back. He saw Lu Qingyuan striding quickly over. His emotionless expression seemed a bit fierce and cold.

Hugging his small water bottle, Chen Annan stood rigidly, wondering what he’d said to make Brother unhappy.

“Who bullied you?” Lu Qingyuan suddenly asked.

Chen Annan’s eyes rounded. He didn’t know how Brother could ask such a thing, but he didn’t dare mention today’s scolding. How embarrassing. Besides, it wasn’t a matter of being bullied; he was the one at fault first.

“Speak. Who bullied you?” Lu Qingyuan repeated.

A child’s emotions leak too obviously; it’s hard to ignore even if one wants to.

Feeling guilty, Chen Annan could only mumble vaguely, “No one, I’m fine.”

He didn’t want to say. Who knew, Xie Xi beside him would eagerly volunteer the answer: “I know! He got scolded by the teacher! It’s okay, I got scolded by the teacher too. We stood in punishment together.”

Chen Annan’s face felt like it was about to combust. He hurriedly covered Xie Xi’s mouth: “You! Stop talking!”

Lu Qingyuan ignored Xie Xi, only asking Chen Annan, “Unhappy because of this?”

Having his little secret exposed, Chen Annan felt guilty and embarrassed. Anxious to leave, he started to go, but Lu Qingyuan said, “Come here.”

Chen Annan shuffled over in tiny steps, getting close to Brother.

The two were about to whisper. Xie Xi understood; when his dad wanted to say something private, he wasn’t allowed near either. He consciously moved to the side to wait for them. He saw Chen Annan standing there dumbly, and then saw Lu Qingyuan suddenly bend his knees, crouching down in front of Chen Annan.

“Actually, the teacher didn’t really say anything,” Chen Annan tried hard to make up for it. “In my last Chinese class, the teacher said my Pinyin was written beautifully. Their stars aren’t as many as mine. And, the Music Teacher said I sing very well and wants me to be the lead singer in front in the future. I even ate a bowl and a half of rice for lunch. Isn’t that really awesome?”

Seeing Brother not speaking, Chen Annan added, “I promised Uncle I’d take care of you. Don’t just keep asking about me. You have to tell me if something’s up with you too, okay?”

Lu Qingyuan still didn’t answer. He just helped fold up a section of Chen Annan’s pant leg. It had rained yesterday; the ground was wet, splashing mud dots with every step. Now, a whole circle around Chen Annan’s pant legs was splattered with small yellowish-brown spots, messy and ugly.

This kid couldn’t even take care of himself properly, yet he was babbling about taking care of others.

Lu Qingyuan said coldly, “Why do you always like playing with idiots?”

The unmistakable impatience in his tone choked Chen Annan’s words in his throat. His fingers rubbed the hem of his clothes. He didn’t stand as straight as before, his shoulders slumping a little. He said quietly, “I understand…”

A child’s mind is delicate and soft. No matter how harshly the teacher scolded him, it wasn’t as disheartening as one sentence from Brother. He had brought up all the things he did well, but he wasn’t praised.

This made him feel very useless.

Lu Qingyuan stood up. He watched Chen Annan bury his chin in the milky-white shirt collar. This shirt was bought a few years ago; it wasn’t as stark white as it first was, now a warm white tinged with pale yellow. Because the pocket edge was printed with a Snoopy pattern, Chen Annan refused to change it, always pulling it out to wear every summer.

Chen Annan’s chubby little face was pushed into a double chin by the collar. A trace of emotion slowly welled up in his eyes.

Racking his brains, Lu Qingyuan could only manage one line of comfort: “Just play with idiots less from now on, and you won’t get scolded.”

Chen Annan obediently nodded and returned to the classroom with Xie Xi.

Because of the scolding, the kid’s mood had been very bad these past few days. Like a little cabbage beaten by hail—green on the outside, but wounded within.

Saturday evening at seven o’clock. “News Broadcast” hadn’t finished yet. In every household, to the steady, measured tones of the hosts’ broadcasts, cooking was underway. The sizzling sounds from woks mixed with oily smoke, seeping in through every crack. You didn’t even need to step outside to smell the aromas.

Lu Wenyuan was loosening soil in a styrofoam box on the balcony. Chen Annan dragged a small stool over and quietly watched Uncle take a small trowel, turning the soil over and over.

In the two years Chen Annan had been here, Lu Wenyuan sprinkled Chrysanthemum Green seeds in the soil every year. This wild vegetable sprouted quickly, could grow in spring and autumn, and only needed a little water to spread into a large patch. It would grow back after cutting, until it produced clusters of little yellow flowers. After collecting the seeds, you could plant them again the next year.

Many households in this city liked planting wild vegetables on their terraces. Those with the means would even open a garden in their own yards, planting chives, celery, setting up grape trellises—everything categorized, all easy to grow.

Chen Annan liked watching Uncle busy at work. He squatted there, half his face hidden in the moonlight, showing a few hints of gentle, unhurried composure.

Lu Wenyuan bowed his head, scattering seeds into the soil, and said with a smile, “You get a heat rash every autumn. I’ll plant some Chrysanthemum Greens. When the time comes, we’ll make egg-drop soup. Perfect to prevent your heat rash. This wild vegetable grows well; one seed can yield a whole patch.”

Propping his head up, Chen Annan asked, “Then, if you plant one Snoopy, will it grow into lots of Snoopies too?”

His way of phrasing it made Lu Wenyuan couldn’t help but smile: “Cub, you can’t grow Snoopies.”

Chen Annan thought for a moment, then said, “Then can we raise one instead? Raise one.”

Lu Wenyuan laughed aloud and said seriously, “Cub, it’s not that Uncle doesn’t want to get you one. We already have Cotton Candy at home. Uncle thinks your ability isn’t quite enough to take care of two little animals at the same time yet. If you raise a life, you have to be responsible for it, right?”

“Okay.” Chen Annan picked at the dirt on the edge of his shoe, feeling a bit gloomy. He then glanced inside the room.

Lu Qingyuan was sitting in front of the electric fan, eating a Little Pudding amidst the creak-creak sound of the rotating fan. Seeming to sense a faint gaze, his eyelashes suddenly flicked up, looking over. Cotton Candy, originally lying at his feet, also raised its head at the same motion.

Chen Annan felt even gloomier. Cotton Candy has already become someone else’s dog, he thought to himself.

His dejection lasted for several days. In the evening, he didn’t even look at his picture books, wanting to climb into bed and sleep as soon as he finished washing up.

But Lu Wenyuan suddenly called the kid into his room and, smiling warmly, handed him a paper bag. “Come, Uncle has a gift for you.”

“What kind of gift?” Chen Annan curiously took the bag. He reached in and pulled out a piece of clothing from the sturdy paper bag. Shaking it open, it was actually a shirt with a Snoopy pattern embroidered on the pocket edge!

His eyes slowly widened, surprised and delighted. His gaze sparkled as he asked, “Why did you buy me clothes?”

Lu Wenyuan’s eyes were very soft. He stroked his head. “Today, your Music Teacher called to tell me you sing beautifully and wants you to be the lead singer in the future. I said, ‘That’s wonderful! Our Nannan might just become a singer someday!’ To celebrate our Nannan’s success, Uncle wanted to give you a gift in advance.”

Chen Annan’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

His little fingers traced the pattern over and over, immensely happy. Hugging Lu Wenyuan’s arm, he said, “The Chinese teacher also praised my good handwriting! I always get three stars in my copybook. Isn’t that really awesome?”

Lu Wenyuan scooped him up, cradled his chin, and praised without reservation, “Of course! Our Nannan is the most amazing kid in the world.”

Having been dejected for so long, finally receiving praise, Chen Annan whimpered softly and threw his arms around Uncle’s neck, clinging affectionately for a good while.

Perhaps too excited, even when going to sleep that night, Chen Annan didn’t forget to flip the shirt over and look at it many times, solemnly placing it beside him. Even after the lights were off, he had to touch it two more times.

Lu Qingyuan found his constant tossing and turning annoying and said, “If you don’t sleep properly, I’ll throw it out.”

Chen Annan turned over, swinging his little legs, and said excitedly, “Brother, Uncle praised me and even gave me a gift.”

Lu Qingyuan, facing away from him, said impatiently, “You’ve said it ten thousand times already.”

Content, Chen Annan closed his eyes and muttered, “Why is Uncle so good? The Music Teacher actually calls home? Does the Math Teacher also call home?”

Thinking of this, he suddenly shivered violently. “How terrifying! I can’t ever get scolded again.”

The Music Teacher, of course, hadn’t called home. Listening to the fragmented mutterings by his ear, Lu Qingyuan thought to himself: If the teacher does come for a home visit, the first thing she’ll say is to tell you not to play with idiots.

The moonlight after rain was gentle, spinning like a film reel to reveal Lu Wenyuan’s astonished face, caught between laughter and tears. “You bought it, you give it. Dad won’t do something like presenting borrowed flowers as a gift.”

Lu Qingyuan didn’t answer, merely pushing the paper bag in front of his dad, and firmly believing—he was never good at comforting people. Never had been.