On Monday, Lin Zhi was absent-minded during class. He even sat next to Song Mian, occasionally bending over to sneak peeks at Song Mian’s abdomen. After several repeated glances, Song Mian reached out and precisely pinched Lin Zhi’s cheek.
Lin Zhi didn’t dare move. With his face pinched red by Song Mian, he dejectedly slumped over the desk.
Song Mian: “……”
After class, Lin Zhi ran off to find Zhu Muyun and dragged him into a bathroom stall. The two squeezed into the narrow space while chatter and the sound of handwashing came from outside.
Zhu Muyun was still in a daze, but when Lin Zhi suddenly lifted his shirt, Zhu Muyun grew unusually tense. “Zhizhi, what are you doing?”
Lin Zhi asked, “Has my belly gotten big?”
Zhu Muyun let out a super confused “ah” and shook his head. “I don’t know.”
Lin Zhi persisted, “A little big?”
Zhu Muyun’s mouth twitched slightly. Completely unable to follow Lin Zhi’s train of thought, he pushed up his glasses and could only comment, “It’s very fair, but no abs. You could work out a bit?”
Lin Zhi heavily dropped his shirt. “Forget it, you can’t tell either. Don’t tell Song Mian.”
Song Mian was terrifying right now.
Zhu Muyun truly didn’t understand, sensing Lin Zhi’s bad mood. “Zhizhi, what happened to you?”
Lin Zhi let out a heavy Sigh
“It’s not entirely clear yet. If it’s real…” Lin Zhi’s expression turned pained. “I probably won’t be able to hide it.”
Zhu Muyun: ?
Lin Zhi didn’t care if anyone was outside and pushed the door open. Zhu Muyun, following closely behind, drew extra glances from the other guys outside. For the first time, Zhu Muyun felt extremely embarrassed.
As soon as Lin Zhi stepped out, Song Mian caught him red-handed. Song Mian leaned against the wall, one leg slightly bent, and glanced over.
Song Mian’s tone was casual. “Cheating on me behind my back?”
Zhu Muyun was utterly baffled.
Lin Zhi immediately dragged the freaking-out Song Mian away.
“Keep acting up like this, and you’ll really end up with no friends,” Lin Zhi said with a sigh and heavy paternal tone after pulling Song Mian into an empty hallway.
Song Mian’s brow arched slightly. “Don’t I have you?”
Lin Zhi lit up with surprise. “Am I a friend?!”
Song Mian said gloomily, “You get b…”
Before he could finish, Lin Zhi covered his mouth. Lin Zhi frowned. “Definitely nothing nice. Don’t say it.”
Song Mian chuckled lightly and fell silent.
Lin Zhi released his hand and figured he could have Song Mian check too. He glanced around, turned his back to the stairs, lifted his shirt, and looked at Song Mian gravely. “Don’t get any ideas! Has my belly gotten bigger?”
Song Mian’s throat bobbed. He reached out and touched it. As the warm, broad palm pressed against him, Lin Zhi jumped back in fright, quickly smoothed his shirt, and glared at Song Mian. “What are you doing?”
Song Mian said matter-of-factly, “Didn’t you tell me to touch it?”
“I meant look at it!” Lin Zhi said furtively. “Compared to the last time you saw, has my belly gotten a bit bigger?”
Song Mian paused for a few seconds, his eyes filling with the deep look of someone staring at an idiot. “Do you think you’re pregnant?”
Lin Zhi bristled at the gaze again.
He weakly retorted, “No! I just feel like I’ve gained weight and was thinking about dieting.”
Song Mian was skeptical. “Really?”
Lin Zhi put on his most sincere expression, widening his eyes. “Really!”
Song Mian then said, “You’ve just gained a bit of meat. Happens when you eat too much.”
Lin Zhi’s lips trembled slightly.
“Really… gained a lot?”
Song Mian’s brow furrowed slightly as he pinched Lin Zhi’s cheek. “You really didn’t suspect pregnancy? Your current situation…”
Song Mian paused for a few seconds and asked, “Can you accept not being human, but the kind of rabbit from the photo?”
Lin Zhi shoved Song Mian’s hand away. “Can you say something that makes sense? Do I look like that fat of a rabbit? I’d at least be the wolf king on the snowy mountain!”
Song Mian: “……”
“I’m serious.”
Lin Zhi shook his head. “No, I’m not fat.”
Song Mian seemed about to say something but instead declared, “You’re not pregnant.”
Lin Zhi’s eyes widened innocently. “Of course I know that! I’m a guy. I just have body image issues.”
Song Mian suddenly gripped Lin Zhi’s waist.
Just as Lin Zhi was about to freak out and flee, Song Mian pulled him into his arms. “What are you anxious about? I can scoop you right up.”
Lin Zhi’s face flushed red as he pushed at Song Mian to let go.
Song Mian didn’t release him and murmured lowly, “Did you show someone else just now too?”
Lin Zhi kept squirming and pushing. “Let’s go back! Not talking about this.”
“Go back and kiss you.”
Lin Zhi sighed.
Lin Zhi still felt like he might be pregnant. Song Mian could even summon spirits! He definitely could get pregnant. Lin Zhi even felt his belly twitching, like a baby kicking him.
The more he dwelled on it, the more scared he got. At noon back in the dorm, Lin Zhi made an excuse to Song Mian about going off-campus to buy carrots, masked up, and hurried out.
Song Mian’s brow furrowed.
After leaving, Lin Zhi put on his mask and slunk to a pharmacy two kilometers from school.
“Hello, handsome. What seems to be the problem?” the shop girl asked enthusiastically.
Lin Zhi pulled his mask higher and glanced around. “W-wait.”
After the man buying cold medicine left, he whispered, “Do you have pregnancy tests?”
The girl’s smile vanished. “Pregnancy test stick?”
Lin Zhi steeled himself. “Yeah, I’ll take one.”
She scanned and bagged it perfunctorily. As Lin Zhi reached the door, he heard her mutter, “Condoms don’t cost much, but too stingy to buy them. Buys a pregnancy test instead—embarrassing. What a menace to young girls.”
Lin Zhi felt wronged, truly wronged. He hadn’t menaced any girls—he’d been menaced by Song Mian! No, he couldn’t really blame Song Mian. It was him who wouldn’t let Song Mian buy condoms.
Lin Zhi stashed it away and checked into a hotel room. Following the instructions, he fumbled through using the pregnancy test stick and waited fifteen minutes.
Lin Zhi squatted on the floor, watching the time. Fifteen minutes up, he checked.
Two lines!
Lin Zhi collapsed helplessly to the ground.
P-pregnant!
He was a guy—how could a guy get pregnant?
One line might be an error, so Lin Zhi decided to test another. As he clumsily handled the second one, a familiar, passionate electronic voice boomed in his mind: [Main mission overcompleted! After being steeped in the male lead’s potent aura, host has successfully escaped cannon fodder fate! Congratulations, Lin Zhi! Your efforts weren’t in vain!]
The Romance Survival System, absent for days, dutifully announced the completion and showered confetti. Meanwhile, Lin Zhi tremblingly saw the second test also show positive!
P-pregnant! Really pregnant!
Fate truly toyed with straight guys like this.
The Romance Survival System spoke: [Host, I’m back! Can you hear me? Your mind feels chaotic. I was just writing the mission summary report. What happened?]
Lin Zhi broke down. “I’m pregnant!”
The system’s electronic voice sounded baffled: [Huh? Host, aren’t you a guy?]
Lin Zhi was devastated, tears falling as he flopped onto the bed and sobbed quietly.
Seeing the situation was set, the Romance Survival System said: [Host, my condolences.]
Lin Zhi grieved for a bit before remembering the system. He wiped his tears. “You finally came back? To say goodbye?”
Romance Survival System: [Not goodbye. Host, the boss had me stick with you first, to watch you get more contact with the male lead, get more ‘nourished’! You’re cannon fodder after all—even escaping plot death, you’ll still be unlucky. Sigh! Host, don’t cry. If you’re pregnant, you’re thoroughly tied to the male lead—no more need for nourishment. It’s good news!]
So the system bro really went off to learn new stuff!
Lin Zhi collapsed.
He flopped back on the bed, pounding it aggrievedly. “Why am I so unlucky to get pregnant? I’m still a student—about to be a dad. I’m a guy—where am I supposed to give birth? In some thatched hut secretly, then work to raise the kid. I… I’m so miserable.”
Lin Zhi kicked his legs wildly, truly aggrieved beyond measure.
The system comforted: [But there’s another dad, right?]
Lin Zhi broke down even more. Him, a guy, pregnant with another guy’s baby—what was this?! Why could guys get pregnant?!
The Romance Survival System didn’t know either.
Lin Zhi sat up from the bed, his face grave. Maybe secretly abort it! Then everything would be fine. But as he touched his belly, he increasingly felt like he was touching a little life.
This was life!
His baby! A little Lin Zhi!
Lin Zhi flopped back down, rolling and throwing a tantrum, muttering “fate toys with straight guys,” “I can’t even feed myself, let alone a kid,” “bastard Song Mian.”
The Romance Survival System weakly reminded: [Host, I hear pregnant women in the first three months are prone to miscarriage. As a pregnant man, be careful too.]
Lin Zhi stopped rolling.
Fatherhood made him resolute.
His gaze firmed. He would keep the baby! On one hand, to fully escape cannon fodder bad luck; on the other, it was his kid after all. But Song Mian—no.
Song Mian was a pervert. With a dad like that, the baby might turn into a little pervert.
But Lin Zhi hesitated. Without Song Mian, he’d have to raise it alone? He had no skills for that—he even mooched food off Song Mian usually. The thought terrified him. What did he know about raising kids? Better a live little pervert than one dead from his care.
At least it’d be alive.
But if Song Mian found out about the baby, he definitely wouldn’t let Lin Zhi go.
Lin Zhi still hoped that once Song Mian’s novelty wore off, they could go back to being bros. Three years of friendship wasn’t something Song Mian’s sudden madness could erase.
With a baby, who bro has a baby with their bro?
Lin Zhi was utterly tormented, lying on the hotel bed as his mind ran wild with tragic visions of single-parenting in wind and sun.
He stayed until nearly two, the trash bin now holding several used test sticks. Lin Zhi had to snap out of it—afternoon classes.
Pregnant and still classes! Lin Zhi rubbed his eyes and rallied.
“System bro, you unemployed lately? If not, go chill in the countryside.”
Romance Survival System longed: [I wish! But I have to watch you don’t abort it.]
Lin Zhi said steadily, “Don’t worry, I know my limits.”
Romance Survival System: [I trust you! But this system has other tasks unrelated to you for now. Boss said if you ask, tell you to help me complete them! Lin Zhi, you don’t have to be so thoughtful— I love following you. Daily entertainment.]
Lin Zhi wouldn’t ask! Lin Zhi was furious! Weakling—even a ghost could bully him!
Lin Zhi dejectedly left the hotel and spotted Song Mian leaning against a car.
What the—?
Lin Zhi rubbed his eyes. Song Mian noticed and walked over. Before Lin Zhi could decide how to face the baby’s other dad, he turned to run—but Song Mian caught him.
“Running where? What if a car hits you?” Song Mian’s tone was a bit stern.
Lin Zhi stood forced before Song Mian, looking up at him as fresh grievance over the “knock-up” welled up. “You’re yelling at me.”
Song Mian’s thumb brushed Lin Zhi’s eye corner, brow furrowed. “Not yelling—just be safe.”
“Crying again? I didn’t bully you today.”
Lin Zhi couldn’t help retorting, “That’s not bullying? You were the one harassing me.”
Song Mian owned it. “Yeah, I harassed you. So what?”
Lin Zhi sighed.
He had to admit, seeing the baby’s other dad right now oddly brought some peace. He couldn’t afford to raise a kid, but Song Mian could. Song Mian was overly aggressive now, but he was good at taking care of people.
B-but how to say it?
A big guy like him, pregnant?
Tears welled in Lin Zhi’s eyes again. Not wanting Song Mian to see, he pressed his forehead to Song Mian’s chest. “I-I have something.”
Song Mian gently held Lin Zhi, patting his back soothingly. “What is it?”
I’m pregnant with your baby! The words stuck in his throat.
“How’d you know I was here?”
Song Mian: “Passing by on the way to buy chestnuts.”
Lin Zhi didn’t quite buy it. “Are you stalking me? Why do you always run into me whenever I’m buying chestnuts?”
Song Mian admitted it outright. “Yeah.”
Lin Zhi pressed, “So that time at the men’s clinic—that was you stalking me too?”
Song Mian murmured, “Zhizhi, I wasn’t comfortable leaving you alone.”
sigh.
Lin Zhi wasn’t actually trying to pick a fight with Song Mian. After all, Song Mian had always been like this. When he wasn’t being a total pervert, his control-freak tendencies were still off the charts. And now they were even worse—he wanted to know Lin Zhi’s whereabouts every minute of the day.
Lin Zhi couldn’t be bothered to argue about it. Sharing his location wasn’t a huge deal, and there was no real downside—as long as Song Mian didn’t suddenly kiss him or anything.
“So what exactly is going on?” Song Mian lifted Lin Zhi’s face. His eyes were a little red, but there weren’t any tears staining his cheeks.
Lin Zhi bit his lip. “I-I…”
I’m pregnant with your baby! But then he suddenly remembered that idiotic look Song Mian had given him before, and Lin Zhi jerked his head away stiffly. “N-Nothing. I’m holding it together for now. I don’t need you.”
Song Mian: ?
