Chapter 45: Fougère

That day, Fatty had originally promised to treat them all to dinner, a hot pot meal for the four of them.

But when Han Fu found Pei Zhen, he saw him leaning against the sofa, a book fallen open on his lap, fast asleep.

“Zhenzhen?” He called him softly twice. Pei Zhen’s breathing was steady and even; there was no response.

“How can you fall asleep sitting up? You’ll catch a cold. Seriously, one moment I’m not watching and you’re this careless.”

Han Fu grumbled under his breath, then moved to pick him up. But his gaze slid downward and stalled.

With difficulty, he lifted his eyes, glancing toward Fatty and Yu Wenzhe on the other side of the sofa, and offered them an awkward expression.

“Um, how about you two go eat by yourselves? Something just came up on my end…”

Yu Wenzhe and Fatty nodded simultaneously, wearing expressions that said “We understand, we totally understand.” They closed the door and evacuated at lightning speed.

Han Fu breathed a sigh of relief.

Thank goodness those two had been standing on the other side of the sofa and couldn’t see the tantalizing view from this angle.

“…”

He glanced down at Pei Zhen again and swallowed.

It was late in the afternoon, and fine, falling asleep on the sofa. But what was with this shirt?

The top three buttons below his neck were undone, gaping open all the way down his chest, and the fabric was a rumpled mess of creases. Not only was his shirt disheveled, but his hair was also somewhat mussed, as if someone had just had their way with him.

…In your own home, there exists a young man who loves you to the point of explosion and whose hormones are in their prime impulse stage!

Is being this defenseless really okay?

Beneath the shirt, alluring lines of lean muscle were faintly visible. Just last month, Pei Zhen’s company had set up a small fitness area, purchasing some standard equipment for employees to use during breaks.

Han Fu knew about this. Sometimes, when Pei Zhen had free time, he’d go give the equipment a try, and it had clearly been effective. The lines of his arms and waist had become incredibly tempting lately, his lean muscles firmer than before, and exceptionally nice to touch.

“…” He honestly didn’t know whether to cry or laugh.

Clearly, every single day, the intensity of his affection was already dialed up to the max without any reservation. Anyone with eyes and ears who wasn’t deaf or blind would absolutely be able to sense it.

Did his Zhenzhen simply not take his love seriously, or was he absolutely certain he was too chicken to make a move?

Who’s a chicken.

What a damned injustice. If it weren’t for the fact that he liked you so damn much and wanted to cherish you properly, who the hell would be staying up sleepless every night, gritting their teeth through cold showers and still stubbornly waiting?!

Young men have their dignity too!

Keep this up and you’ll get… you know! Don’t you get it!

……

After enduring for so many years.

Han Fu thought, forget it. Grin and bear it, just tough it out a few more days.

With a heavy heart, he reached out to button Pei Zhen’s shirt back up, but just then, he heard a soft, drowsy murmur and Pei Zhen woke up.

He half-opened his eyes, looking utterly dazed, and grabbed Han Fu’s hand.

Perhaps hungry, he directly brought that hand with its clearly defined knuckles to his mouth, nibbling and licking it in small, delicate movements. It didn’t hurt, just a slight ticklish, tingling sensation. Then he pecked repeatedly at the back of his hand, refusing to let go.

“…” As they say, the fingers connect to the heart.

Han Fu got pathetically, agonizingly hard in a second.

And it wasn’t over. The man he liked then lazily stretched out both arms toward him. “What time is it? I’m so tired, carry me to the bath.”

His voice was hoarse, with a nasal tone. A normally so-serious, mature, and self-composed man suddenly, in a dazed state, asking to be carried? Who could possibly resist that?

But something’s wrong here?

Some tiny shred of rationality remained in Han Fu. He had helped Pei Zhen with baths before, and he had carried him before. But it had always been him taking the initiative to knock on the door and squeeze into the bathroom, with Pei Zhen sporting a reluctant, unwilling expression the entire time, even piling up the bubbles in the tub to thoroughly cover himself.

Pei Zhen actively saying “carry me,” or anything like that—not even once.

Not to mention, this time when Han Fu bent down and scooped him up, Pei Zhen’s hands directly and actively wrapped around his neck. Nuzzling against his neck, he even took the initiative to kiss his ear.

The kisses sent wave after wave of tingling pleasure straight down his spine, making it almost impossible to even hold onto him.

But there was no help for it; Pei Zhen kept at it.

“Zhenzhen, stop messing around.”

Han Fu stiffened his neck and made a tentative, death-defying move: “…Don’t you go seducing me.”

Saying something like that, under normal circumstances, would cause a major disaster.

You see, Pei Zhen, after all, was a hardline macho gay whose motto was “I can provide for others, but no one provides for me.” Dealing with a macho gay, you can tease him, you can seduce him, but you absolutely cannot ever tell a macho gay “stop messing around,” or “don’t you go seducing me.”

That’s the bottom line of a macho gay’s dignity.

Treating a macho gay like a Little Cutie is as severe as slandering his character and will get you blacklisted in a minute.

But this time, Pei Zhen actually didn’t get angry.

Not only did he not get angry, but after kissing his ear, he directly leaned in, seeking a kiss.

Even if Han Fu dared not be sure before, he was certain now — Pei Zhen was seducing him!

“…” Though delighted and immensely flattered.

It still doesn’t make sense?

“Zhenzhen, what’s gotten into you today? You’re not acting like yourself.”

Han Fu said this while carrying him, simultaneously dodging his relentless kiss assaults, utterly bewildered. He glanced back at the coffee table beside the sofa.

The coffee table was empty. Just the white frosted glass flower vase and a few newly bought daisies. No pill bottle.

Han Fu wasn’t at ease. He asked him again, “Zhenzhen, are you feeling sick? Did you secretly take that heart medicine again without telling me?”

Pei Zhen still didn’t get angry. He just shook his head and continued to bother him.

Han Fu: “No way, you must have taken something; there’s no other explanation!”

……

Although it was already October into the calendar, the lingering autumn heat hadn’t left yet, and the weather in The Magic City wasn’t cold.

Han Fu finished drawing the hot bath and began helping Pei Zhen undress.

…The most unforgettable undressing process of his entire life.

Pei Zhen wore a shirt, trousers, and underwear. Three pieces in total. Looking like he still hadn’t fully woken up, whether high on some weird pill and faking wildness, or genuinely having decided to let loose, he teased the Little Wolfdog into getting hard a full three times.

Afterward, Han Fu was already beyond tears of frustration.

But Pei Zhen still wouldn’t let him off, pressing against him, kissing and rubbing. A clear, dark complexity flickered briefly in his half-lidded eyes.

Of course he was fully awake the entire time.

……

The whole afternoon, Pei Zhen had sat on the sofa, not knowing what to do. He thought about so many things, but in the end, he only asked himself one simple question—

Let go of the doggo like this, just tell him to scram. Could he bear to part with him?

The answer was no, he couldn’t.

So, did he still want to be with him? The answer was yes. Although what he wanted was the original silly doggo, not the unfamiliar-faced little punk in that video.

But, being unable to let go — that alone was enough.

That day in the parking lot, Yi Changqing, red-eyed, had questioned him, “And aren’t you at fault too?”

It sounded completely insane, but Pei Zhen actually understood what Yi Changqing meant. That relationship had ultimately ended in misery, and he truly wasn’t entirely without fault.

His fault was that, after discovering Yi Changqing’s deception, the pain had been so uncontrollable that he’d confronted him hysterically, exposed him to his face. And afterward, he’d constantly dug up this old history and been melodramatic about it.

He had been far too aggrieved back then.

But the problem was, Pei Zhen had later analyzed the experience — venting felt good for a moment, but what did it get you in the end? Nothing at all.

It only accelerated suspicion and estrangement, eventually becoming unmanageable, hurting both others and himself.

Later, before meeting Han Fu, in the long stretch of time after breaking up with Yi Changqing, Pei Zhen had had the same dream countless times. In the dream, everything from that year played out again, but he held back the impulse and did not confront him.

Not only did he not tear off the facade, but he completely changed his strategy. He treated Yi Changqing even better than before, using every ounce of charm to entice him, to placate him, to lure him until he could never bear to leave.

In some dreams, he succeeded.

In other dreams, even after exhausting every bit of strength, it still ended in failure.

But at least, he had given the other person a lifetime of unforgettable tenderness. Any partner after that would pale in comparison, and never could they fling back a choking line like, “Aren’t you at fault too?”

The past is long gone.

“Back then” is too far away now; there’s no going back.

But the “present” is still right here before him. Pei Zhen could even be thankful for the lessons of that past experience. It gave him the chance to try his hand at seducing his silly doggo.

Today, even the bath fizz ball was exceptionally cooperative.

One drop and it barely even foamed. Pei Zhen, with shameless nonchalance, swished his thigh around in the water. “Coming in?”

……

At that point, Han Fu utterly snapped.

His brain short-circuited instantly. He tumbled into the bathtub with his clothes still on, hot water sloshing all over the floor. His black shirt clung to his body, outlining the young and vigorous lines of his physique.

Rubbing against the person beneath him through soaked clothing, he panted slightly. “Zhenzhen.”

The steam curled and thickened. The person before his eyes seemed now near, now far. The slightly scalding water temperature made his already muddled mind even more chaotic.

Within that chaos, he pondered. Zhenzhen was such a mature person. When he wanted something, he would typically pursue it himself without hesitation.

They had already kissed plenty. Maybe today, Pei Zhen simply felt it was about time to do something more?

He wanted him, so he came to seduce. There didn’t seem anything wrong with that, did there?

The more Han Fu thought, the happier he got, the more rational it all seemed. His smile grew wider and wider. So Zhenzhen was actually this direct? That’s just too adorable.

“Zhenzhen, I really… I really like you so much.”

Their previous kisses, while not all purely chaste, had still been shy and gentle, for the most part.

But this time, the wolfdog who had held back for half a year was finally getting his meat. With a howl, he pounced.

……

Pei Zhen was kissed dizzy and breathless.

So oxygen-deprived that he didn’t even know when he was fished out of the tub, dried off, and placed on the bed.

The Little Wolfdog’s weight pressed down. In the darkness, his body began to tremble uncontrollably.

Pei Zhen certainly didn’t want to tremble.

…He truly didn’t.

Over thirty years old, and shivering like this on the verge of sex? That’s just too ridiculous.

But his body utterly disobeyed. The harder his nerves screamed to be still, the more violently he shook!

Han Fu kissed his ear, lightly biting his still-damp neck, his palm stroking down his back in soothing motions. His voice seemed to carry shape and ripples, tingling against his ear, eliciting a numb, electrifying sensation.

“Zhenzhen, that day in the garage… I overheard you tell Yi Changqing that you two ‘never did anything.'”

The body in his arms stiffened. Han Fu hurriedly explained, “I don’t mind that at all! It’s just, I thought since you two lived together, you must’ve long since…”

“I just wanted to ask, Zhenzhen.”

“You… you can’t be… a first-timer?”

Two blank seconds passed in the darkness. Pei Zhen shook his head several times, fiercely.

Han Fu laughed. You’re trembling like this and you’re shaking your head ‘no’?

“Don’t be scared,” he coaxed him, “we’ll take this slowly.”

Pei Zhen felt utterly stifled and mortified.

Dragging it out until thirty, humiliating himself completely, and then to be comforted by a younger guy saying, “Don’t be scared.”

And it wasn’t even over. Han Fu kissed his cheek again. Pei Zhen couldn’t see his face in the darkness, but he felt, somehow, those dark eyes must be full of tenderness.

“Don’t worry, I won’t make it hurt.”

As if it wouldn’t hurt.

Pei Zhen closed his eyes in resignation.

Mai Zi said it hurt like hell, hurt so bad you cry yourself into a pathetic ball, okay?!

……

Darkness made every sensation abnormally acute.

Pei Zhen breathed lightly, feeling his body being traced by fingers, by scorching lips.

It was like tiny sparks and electric currents, his body growing hotter and hotter. He clenched his teeth, his panting becoming more and more rapid. He even began to twist subconsciously, arching his waist, several times pushing at the person above him, his voice hoarse, begging him, “Let me go.”

But those words weren’t true. It was just that the feeling of pleasure mixed with unbearable fullness was too much to bear.

Fortunately, Han Fu wasn’t that clueless. While carefully exploring and stretching him, he soothed him, kissing his closed eyes and his lightly fluttering eyelashes over and over again.

It felt increasingly good.

Tingly and numb, like lying atop a cloud. But what was wrong with his body? Why was he still trembling?

It destabilized his emotions too.

Under such meticulous, intense kisses, his eyes, against all reason, treacherously grew wet.

Han Fu kissed the trace of moisture and paused briefly.

He didn’t continue stretching him as before. Instead, he gently kissed his forehead, then his nose, his mouth, all the way down…

Pei Zhen’s eyes widened.

His waist arched up and then collapsed heavily back down. His thighs and calves trembled even more violently, his toes curling tight.

He seriously hadn’t intended to cry, but the tears, with a will of their own, began falling uncontrollably. Heat gnawed at his consciousness. It was like being tossed upon a stormy, raging sea; or like crawling, parched with thirst, through a desert, dizzy under the blazing sun.

……

“Did that feel good?”

Pei Zhen didn’t make a sound. He still couldn’t catch his breath or recover. Though it was dark, he saw motes of vivid color before his eyes.

The voice beside his ear held a hint of pride, but more than anything, a deep tenderness. “So… wanna go again?”

He wanted to shake his head, but it was too late. They went again.

Afterward, his whole body was sore and limp, utterly exhausted.

He was simply too tired; he couldn’t resist the sleep crashing over him. He knew he shouldn’t — Han Fu was still hard, and the place pressed against him was truly, damnably hard, yet he had endured, making Pei Zhen feel good twice first, without going all the way.

The body doesn’t lie. That already spoke volumes, certainly indicative.

His last impression was Han Fu holding him close, kissing the ends of his hair.

Pei Zhen thought, when he woke up tomorrow morning, he should really think things over again more thoroughly.

If this isn’t love, then there’s no explaining it.