God as Neighbor

To gather material for his stories, pulp fiction writer Yu Bai rented a room in the city’s infamous Haunted Neighborhood. Before long, he realized that his next-door neighbor was decidedly odd.

So he knocked on the neighbor’s door and politely asked, “Are you human?”

Xie Wufang’s expression flickered behind the door as he racked his brain for the relevant advice from the Human Life Guide. At last, he nodded with feigned composure.

Satisfied with the answer, Yu Bai turned and walked away, utterly calm.

Perfect. Definitely not human.

A week later, Yu Bai—now at the end of his rope—knocked on the strange neighbor’s door once more. He clung to his last shred of restraint as he said, “Can you move out?”

Xie Wufang had the guide memorized backward and forward by now. He smiled with precisely the right amount of friendliness. “Sorry, has something been bothering you?”

Yu Bai’s smile was all teeth and no warmth. “The guy next door beats drums with bones every single day. And the kid downstairs climbs out of the plumbing at night to make me help her with her homework.”

Xie Wufang betrayed no surprise, offering his advice with warm enthusiasm. “Sounds like a public nuisance to me. You should call the cops.”

Yu Bai finally snapped. He lunged forward and seized the mysterious neighbor by the collar, biting out each word: “Stop. Pretending.”

“Either fix everything around here and make it normal again.”

“Or get the hell out.”

What Yu Bai didn’t know was that his mysterious neighbor had been diligently reining in his power all along. Ordinary humans were simply too fragile—even the tiniest leak of divine energy could twist reality into absurd mutations.

And right then, Xie Wufang—experiencing his first real contact with a human—found himself momentarily distracted by the fearless threat inches from his face.

Human skin was this warm.

In that instant of distraction, an even greater mishap occurred.

Fearless, world-weary shut-in bottom × Persistent god top who strives every day to pass as human, only to veer hilariously off course

A non-standard infinite-flow tale: lighthearted, absurd summer adventures.