The Crematorium’s Scum Gong Gets to Clock Off After Being Replaced 70

Chapter 70: Roommate 30

“It’s definitely not me who stole it! Maybe I took the wrong clothes when I was collecting them… no, that’s not right!” Gu Xiu calmed down a little, his index finger pointing at his roommate’s nose, his tone certain. “Chen Beichuan, you dog, you must have framed me!”

But Chen Beichuan didn’t care. His eyes were fixed on him. He grabbed Gu Xiu’s finger and asked as he approached him, “You stole my clothes, you stole my socks, and now you’re even stealing my underwear… Gu Xiu, do you like me?”

Gu Xiu was angry and embarrassed and kept backing away. “You gay man, do you see everyone as gay!”

“But you get a reaction when I touch you,” Chen Beichuan kept pressing. “And your expression is particularly satisfied.”

“…” Gu Xiu looked away, his confidence also half gone. “That’s a normal reaction for a man. It only shows that I’m very healthy.”

Chen Beichuan laughed, but his eyes were very cold. He asked again, “So it’s okay if someone else touches you?”

Gu Xiu’s voice became smaller and smaller. “I’m not that kind of casual person…”

After a while, he turned his head back and was scared by Chen Beichuan, who was so close. The back of his head and his entire back were pressed against the wall.

But on the small 0.9-meter single bed, there was very little space for him to hide.

Chen Beichuan pressed his forehead against his, his eyes wanting to pierce through the surface and see into his real heart, the color of his soul.

Gu Xiu’s heart was in a panic. He couldn’t avoid it. As soon as his eyes dodged, Chen Beichuan immediately chased after him and also held his chin.

“Did you know that if it’s someone you like, you’ll also get a reaction from a kiss?”

Gu Xiu said without thinking, “I’m not! I’m a scum man! I can’t control my lower body…”

Chen Beichuan was really angered by this broken mouth. He didn’t care, his nose was staggered, and he fiercely bit the mouth that was opening and closing.

“Mmph!”

Gu Xiu was forced to be muted.

Compared to a kiss, this was a complete venting bite. Gu Xiu tasted a faint, fishy sweet taste. His competitive spirit rose, and he also bit back, pressing Chen Beichuan down on the single bed.

Chen Beichuan did not struggle or resist to compete with him. He even pressed the back of his head so that he could not escape. His chin was raised, and a vein ran from his jaw to his neck, slightly red from the force.

Gu Xiu had just released his teeth when he was attacked again. But this time, Chen Beichuan’s movements were very light. He gently held his lower lip, and then used his teeth to hold his lip bead, as if he had discovered a rare delicacy, cherishing it and nibbling it in small bites.

The angry vent suddenly turned into ambiguity and lingering. Gu Xiu belatedly realized and quickly went to push away the hand on the back of his head, wanting to get up. He was busy getting away, but Chen Beichuan took advantage of the situation and, with a flip, he was on the bottom.

That probing kiss went all the way in one go.

Gu Xiu, who was on the bottom, could only be forced to accept it. The oxygen was frantically being snatched away. He was panting, his chest heaving violently. Chen Beichuan was still insatiably pressing down on him, really like a hungry dog biting a bone.

“Mm… Chen Beichuan…!”

Chen Beichuan used all the functions of his mouth, licking, kissing, gnawing, biting, sucking, inside and out, like a whirlwind, not letting go of anything.

In the end, he even licked his philtrum and the tip of his nose with a lingering taste.

Gu Xiu was instantly numb from head to toe. He struggled to push away the guy who was pouncing on him like a fierce dog and scolded, “Are you dirty or not!”

He could never scold Chen Beichuan where it hurt. The latter even curled his lips and licked his lips. “You’re not dirty. You’re quite sweet.”

Gu Xiu’s face turned red from his cheeks to the base of his neck. He didn’t know if it was from anger or shame.

He himself didn’t know the reason. His heart was in a mess. In short, he vented his anger first. “Chen Beichuan! Get off my bed!”

“Fine.”

Chen Beichuan wiped his mouth, and the faint smile was also wiped away. As Gu Xiu wished, he turned around and got out of bed.

Gu Xiu quickly covered his head with the quilt, found his phone, and skillfully slid into the lively A University campus forum, scrolling through the posts to calm his racing heart.

Last night, he had accidentally discovered the true identity of the “bird breeder who wants to publish in Nature.” There were also some new replies under his request for help, all saying that this person had ulterior motives and had given him all bad ideas.

Chen Beichuan would say he looked like a little bird from time to time. There were clues everywhere, but he was deceived. Not to mention, Chen Beichuan actually called himself a “bird breeder.” So shameless!

Recently, the forum was full of posts shipping him and Chen Beichuan. Some people couldn’t help but be suspicious, asking, you’re so unrestrained, aren’t you afraid of being banned by the administrator, or even having your IP dug up and being found through the network cable?

Chen Beichuan’s administrator identity was purely for show, but now the trend was gradually changing. They thought that he was definitely secretly lurking, and it was his intention to let everyone ship the CP. The campus prince roommate CP was real!!

The evidence was as numerous as ox hair. The most obvious was that he had abused his public power for private gain and had adjusted the weight of “Gugujiu (deadline version),” causing the recognized top 1 food at the east gate, the stone pot bibimbap, to fall to the bottom, while the chestnut braised pork ribs, which had been given five stars by Gugujiu, had risen to first place.

“Gugujiu (deadline version)” was definitely Gu Xiu. Thus, all sorts of “Gugujiu” with different suffixes popped up like mushrooms after a rain, either playing with memes or fantasizing that they could also get the campus prince’s favor. This was also why the “Gugujiu (runaway university student version)” who had posted for help was seen as a campus prince dream zero.

And that “Bank who wants to publish in Nature,” who had a crush on his roommate, was very likely Chen Beichuan’s lurking side account!

Gu Xiu: “…”

Gu Xiu lay on his bed and wasted the whole day. He only got out of bed in the evening and swayed behind Chen Beichuan, who was writing code with his head down, for a while.

Chen Beichuan turned his head sharply.

Gu Xiu was so parched by that look that he licked his lips and hesitantly held up his phone, tentatively asking, “This bird breeder who wants to publish in Nature… do you… know him?”

Chen Beichuan looked at him, was silent for a few seconds, and asked back, “Do you really want to know?”

Gu Xiu had a gut feeling that this answer would lead to something extraordinary. He was suddenly speechless. “I…”

He was so annoyed by Chen Beichuan’s gray eyes that he scratched his ears and cheeks. After a long while, he laughed it off and changed the subject he had brought up. “This person still wants to publish in Nature. It feels quite far-fetched.”

With that, he climbed back onto his own bed. If he didn’t want to face reality, he would immediately drill into his bird’s nest and hide.

“Uh, right,” Gu Xiu stood on the ladder and looked back. “Thank you for taking us to Disneyland yesterday. Next time, let Lingling treat you. By the way, let’s just forget about you testing my sexual orientation. We’re still buddies in the future.”

Chen Beichuan’s eyes were filled with a thousand words. After a long while, he blinked, and his short, dense eyelashes covered all his emotions.

He sighed lightly.

“You’re really something, Gu Xiu.”

When he looked up again, there was a smile on his lips, but his eyes were so calm that it was alarming.

“You actually made me so timid.”

Leaving behind a vague sentence, Chen Beichuan left the dormitory.

Gu Xiu waited for a while, but he didn’t see him come back. It seemed he hadn’t gone to the bathroom.

AngryWiddleBird
: 【Did you go out to buy food? I want to eat the chestnut braised pork ribs from the east gate】

CBC: 【1】

“?” What kind of attitude?

AngryWiddleBird: 【No scallions, no cilantro, no soup, and no ribs…】

Even with such a ridiculous request—

CBC: 【1】

AngryWiddleBird: 【Why are you talking like this?】

Chen Beichuan was like he was stuck on a barbell.

CBC: 【Do I talk to others like this?】

Gu Xiu’s subconscious reaction was “Am I others?” but then he was startled by his own terrifying thought. Of course he was others. Not only was he others, but he was also a rival in love, and even a task-taker from another world.

But strangely enough, when Chen Beichuan suddenly became cold, he was a little unhappy.

AngryWiddleBird: 【Uh, are you angry? Because of me?】

I’m angry that you’re a fool, angry that you’re a block of wood, angry that you’re playing dumb, and you’re heartless.

Chen Beichuan thought of a lot, and his mouth was full of blame, but in the end, he only typed one word.

CBC: 【Mm.】

AngryWiddleBird: 【…】

AngryWiddleBird: 【I won’t steal your clothes anymore.】

Gu Xiu avoided the main point.

He thought for a moment and added an emoji.

AngryWiddleBird: 【(Little bird collapsed.jpg)】

Out of sight, out of mind. Chen Beichuan clicked his tongue, put away his phone, kicked a few pebbles, and changed his course to the east gate.

Gu Xiu took an afternoon nap and was woken up by the rich smell of food.

He poked his head out from the upper bunk and saw a row of various lunch boxes on the desk. He smelled the familiar smell of braised chestnuts, and also his favorite spicy rice noodles, the recently popular mào cài—basically like a hotpot—plus a large bottle of Coke…

He quickly got out of bed. Although he was drooling from the delicious food, he turned his steps and first found Chen Beichuan, who was squatting in a corner and packing his luggage.

“I’m going to stay out for a few days. This project is about to be finished, and I’m very busy. It’s not convenient to go to the research institute from school,” Chen Beichuan said.

This was too sudden… Gu Xiu’s eyes were filled with astonishment.

007 timely reminded, 【According to the plot, it’s about time for the protagonist gong to rent a place outside.】

Gu Xiu clicked his tongue and said “Oh.” “Then I’ll eat… are these all for me?”

Chen Beichuan’s attitude was as cold as typing “1” online. “Mm.”

Gu Xiu sat down in his own chair, his back to him, listening to the rustling sound of packing luggage while eating absentmindedly.

Chen Beichuan left as soon as he said he would. He quickly packed a few changes of clothes, and in Gu Xiu’s gaze, he left with his suitcase without looking back.

Gu Xiu put down his chopsticks.

007 popped out and flew around in the now spacious dormitory. 【Now you can enjoy your own space! The protagonist gong’s beautiful clothes are all yours now!!】

【Please, I wear his clothes to maintain my persona. I’m not interested in those flashy clothes…】 Gu Xiu stood up, mumbling, 【Huh? Where’s my ugly thing? Pah, it’s all because of Chen Beichuan—where’s my peanut?】

A few days ago, it had been raining one after another. Every time, Chen Beichuan would timely move his peanut plant into the dormitory, and when it was sunny, he would take it out to sunbathe.

When winter came, the northern winter climate was severe, and this favored peanut had a place in the dormitory, the sunniest spot by the window.

So Gu Xiu noticed it at a glance.

His peanut was gone!

He quickly turned around in the dormitory a few times and even opened Chen Beichuan’s closet to search, but he couldn’t even find a leaf.

【Where’s my peanut? Where’s my big pot of peanuts?】 Gu Xiu murmured to himself, gradually becoming anxious.

After thinking it over, there could only be one culprit.

Speaking of which, there was another matter.

Gu Xiu took out his phone and angrily sent two messages to Chen Beichuan, settling both accounts at once.

AngryWiddleBird: 【I still haven’t found the gray underwear I lost last time!!】

AngryWiddleBird: 【And, where’s my peanut plant??】

CBC: 【It’s with me】

CBC: 【I mean the plant】

AngryWiddleBird: 【? You stole my peanut?】

CBC: 【What, you’re allowed to steal mine, but I’m not allowed to steal yours?】

CBC: 【I’ll also eat the peanuts it grows :)】

AngryWiddleBird: 【??? Give it back!】

CBC: 【Come and get it yourself.】

CBC: [Share address…]

Chen Beichuan had the unique protagonist’s halo of this world, a very high IQ, and a fast brain. Gu Xiu couldn’t win an argument with him. He gave up and threw away his phone, choosing to go to sleep.

【I’m full, I can’t sleep.】 But Gu Xiu tossed and turned, unable to sleep. 【Should I go and find him…】

【…】 007 was an experienced person. It saw through the host’s little thoughts but did not expose them, letting him be duplicitous, and only hinted tactfully, 【If you want to find him, then go. The plot won’t collapse that easily.】

【It’s not that I want to find him.】 Gu Xiu hugged his knees and hid the lower half of his face. 【He stole my peanut…】

Gu Xiu said righteously, 【He even said he would eat my grandson!】

【?】 007 was confused. 【Your grandson?】

【I raised that peanut plant with my own hands. It’s my non-blood-related, different-species biological son,】 Gu Xiu said. 【The peanuts it grows are of course my grandson.】

007: 【…………】

Fine.

007 became exceptionally docile. After a while, it suddenly said with a sentimental tone, 【Hey, I also want to find Yuanyuan.】

【Don’t even think about it,】 Gu Xiu said unceremoniously. 【She’s a paper character, and you’re a system. Neither of you is a real person. There’s no future.】

He paused, and Gu Xiu put his hands behind his head and looked at the gray ceiling. He said again, 【The novel didn’t say that Chen Beichuan has a sister. When this world collapses, you won’t even know where to look for her. She’s not in the novel either.】

007 was silent. It suddenly brought up the A University promotional video that Gu Xiu and Chen Beichuan had filmed before, which was widely circulated as an officially produced CP content.

007 did not search for the video online to play, but instead read Gu Xiu’s memory. Once, while Chen Beichuan was out, he had sat in front of the computer and had secretly opened the promotional video of the two of them.

The video was only a dozen minutes long, with repeated cycles and chases, and finally, it froze on a look back.

The subtitles showed the conclusion of this documentary, which was narrated by Gu Xiu and sounded in their silent gaze.

“Class was never for the sake of ending class, and meeting was not for the sake of saying goodbye. The most important thing was the time that was truly spent, that period of youth, whether beautiful or not, was the meaning itself.”

Gu Xiu was still immersed in the aftertaste of the promotional video. The small silver ball of light drew a brilliant path of light in the air, like a meteor, and said noisily, 【See! Live in the moment, Jiujiu! If you want to find him, then go bravely!!】

Gu Xiu thought of those scum man colleagues who had sown their wild oats everywhere in the small world, which he had sneered at. He rolled his eyes and controlled the flying ball of light. 【I told you, you’re more suitable for this scum gong mission than I am.】

Then he was stunned again.

The feeling of déjà vu when he said this was really strange.

The next morning, Gu Xiu was woken up by a knock on the door.

He was half-asleep and thought it was the rude Chen Beichuan. He had completely forgotten that the other could open the door with a QR code and come back silently.

When he opened the dormitory door, the bright sunlight poured in. Gu Xiu squinted his eyes, and the chaos in his eyes instantly dissipated, clearly reflecting a beautiful and well-featured woman.

“…Huh!?”

“Oh my,” the woman shyly covered her face and smiled. “I came early. I hope I didn’t disturb your sleep, did I?”

Gu Xiu was confused and scratched his head. “No… I’m awake.”

The woman’s smile was so wide her eyes disappeared. As soon as she got his words, she immediately rushed in. “Then I’ll be disturbing you—huh?”

Gu Xiu’s bed was a mess, but the opposite bed was neat. The bedsheet was spread out immaculately, and there wasn’t even a quilt!

Seeing the woman staring at his bed, Gu Xiu quickly explained, “I’m sorry, my bed is a little messy. I didn’t tidy it up when I got up this morning… wait, who are you?”

So there was no one hiding in his bed either.

The woman sighed with regret, and only after she had composed herself did she smile and reply to Gu Xiu, “Nice to meet you. My name is Lu Qingwu.”

The problem wasn’t what her name was… Gu Xiu’s confusion grew. The woman named Lu Qingwu was well-maintained and looked to be in her thirties or forties. Her long, wavy hair was a little mature, and she was wearing a luxury Chanel-style suit and carrying an exquisite crocodile leather bag.

The dormitory for the two of them was only luxurious compared to other dormitories. In front of this rich and noble woman, it was not enough. But she was quite adaptable and was curiously looking around.

Seeing no one else around, she could only ask Gu Xiu, “Is Beichuan not here? He went out so early?”

Gu Xiu: “Mm…”

The enthusiastic Lu Qingwu said to herself, “He went to the library again? This child is really… it’s almost vacation, why is he still so hardworking? Leaving you alone in the dormitory, that’s not right.”

“Wait,” Gu Xiu frowned and interrupted. “Sister, who are you?”

The woman was overjoyed by his compliment and chuckled twice before replying, “Not sister, but auntie. No, no, you can just call me auntie.”

Gu Xiu came to his senses. “Could it be…?”

But the woman once again snatched the words, and said with full confidence, “Auntie already knows you. Gu Xiu, right? Beichuan’s little boyfriend!”