“So you were just messing around with your brother, and when he got fed up, he bit you?” Kang Che raised his eyebrows at Qin Zui.
“Something like that.” Qin Zui looked like he didn’t want to talk about it.
“I totally believe that.” Kang Che laughed.
“Believe it or don’t.” Qin Zui smiled too, leaning back in his chair to spin his phone again. “Keep your thoughts bottled up inside.”
“That’s your brother on your lock screen too, right?” Kang Che suddenly changed the subject.
Qin Zui looked up and stared at him.
“What’s with the look? I’m not gonna steal your phone.” Kang Che didn’t ask any more questions, just stretched comfortably with a yawn.
“Relax.” A smile lingered at the corner of his mouth as he started fiddling with the computer again.
Relax about what, and why? Kang Che didn’t say, and Qin Zui didn’t ask.
He could probably guess what Kang Che meant, just like he could sense that Kang Che was the same breed as him.
Kang Che was probably thinking the same thing.
After that, Kang Che started sharing his supposed “senior student” experience.
It wasn’t really experience, more like goals he’d set for himself, and the lengths he knew some hardworking people would go to.
Qin Zui found it pretty interesting. He’d never thought words like “research” could appear in his first year of college life before.
Originally, his only vague plan for his freshman year was to pass the CET-4 and CET-6 exams.
“So you’re in a group with the senior students?” he asked Kang Che.
“I’m connected through a teacher from the senior year. Got in through him.” Kang Che said. “A lot of teachers have their own projects. It’s better than being bored, keeps me busy.”
He made it sound so casual, but looking at the mess of materials on his desk, Qin Zui’s impression of Kang Che as a slacker completely flipped.
“Take me with you.” He tossed an apple to Kang Che.
“Wasn’t this mine in the first place?” Kang Che caught it and looked at it.
Qin Zui laughed.
“Go to class for a month first, get a feel for it.” Kang Che tossed the apple back. “If you really get into it, you’ll barely have time to see your brother.”
For Qin Zui, not being able to see Jiang Chu wasn’t really a matter of time.
Whether it was a day or a month, as long as Jiang Chu wasn’t somewhere he could see or bump into him whenever he wanted, the intensity of his “missing Jiang Chu” was always the same.
If he dared to apply for the eight-year medical program, he was prepared for a long period of longing.
It would be the new normal in his college life. But he couldn’t afford to drop the ball on anything else he needed to do.
Qin Zui wasn’t worried about himself. His only worry was Jiang Chu’s state of mind.
Everything Jiang Chu had told him in the hotel room, Qin Zui didn’t actually misunderstand. He just chose not to think about it.
But he knew Jiang Chu couldn’t do it.
When they were together, he could forcibly drag all of Jiang Chu’s attention to himself.
After Jiang Chu went back, as the holidays ended and everyone went back to their classes and jobs, they fell back into the same state as before the October break.
They talked on the phone or messaged every day, occasionally video chatted. Even if Jiang Chu seemed fine on the surface, Qin Zui still felt uneasy.
——People’s mentality changes with their environment.
Who knows if by the time he went home for New Year’s to see Jiang Chu, Jiang Chu would already be influenced by his parents and friends, telling him again that he “can’t keep doing this”.
“New Year’s?” Jiang Chu’s focus landed on that date, his voice sounding a bit hesitant. “What about New Year’s Day? How are you planning to spend that?”
“Missing me?” Qin Zui pressed the earpiece in his ear, trying to make Jiang Chu’s voice sound closer.
“Don’t I have to ask how you’re arranging your holidays? What if you suddenly want to come home and I have other plans that clash?” said Jiang Chu.
“What plans do you have?” The first thought that popped into Qin Zui’s head was “blind date”.
“I’m just saying. What’s with the tone you’re using with your brother?” Jiang Chu didn’t really have any plans. Every year after November, he was always swamped with work.
Qin Zui was pretty much the same.
Kang Che was right. Once classes really started, time somehow became scarce, varying from person to person.
The so-called semester only lasted a few months at most. He had to pass English exams, get high scores, prepare for his major courses, and make himself grow as fast as he could, faster…
Especially after he contacted his department teacher to get into the lab, his freshman year became much more complicated and fulfilling than he had imagined.
“The New Year’s break is short. They arranged a small project for us, and I haven’t figured out how to spend it yet.” Qin Zui leaned back in his chair, grabbing his phone to check the time.
“You really don’t give me anything to worry about.” Jiang Chu sighed with a smile on the phone. “Make sure you rest too. Today’s the weekend, isn’t it? You don’t have to push yourself too hard in your first year…”
“I miss you.” Qin Zui said.
“Hey, I know.” Jiang Chu paused for a moment before responding. “Are you in the dorm or somewhere else? Is anyone around?”
“Dorm, I’m the only one here.” Qin Zui moved the mouse, pausing the online class. “Mao Sui went home, Xu Bowen and Kang Che went to the library.”
Jiang Chu hummed in acknowledgment. He thought about it but couldn’t think of anything else to tell him. Qin Zui always had his own plans for everything.
He was just about to say, “Remember to eat at mealtime, and if there’s nothing else, let’s hang up,” when Qin Zui called out to him again: “Let’s video chat, bro.”
Jiang Chu hung up the phone and half a minute later, sent Qin Zui a video request.
“You just woke up.” Qin Zui laughed at the sight of him leaning against the headboard with messy hair.
“I was working on a project until three in the morning. Didn’t even wash my face.” Jiang Chu rubbed his eyes, buried his head in his hands, and yawned.
He really had just woken up and hadn’t even gotten out of bed. He grabbed his phone to reply to Qin Zui, and somehow they ended up talking on the phone and then video chatting.
“Since when do you wear clothes to sleep?” Qin Zui looked at the tight black tank top he was wearing. The lines of his shoulders and neck that were exposed were smooth and beautiful.
He switched hands to hold the phone.
Jiang Chu never had the habit of wearing clothes to sleep. There wasn’t even a “pajama” category in his wardrobe. He just stripped down to his boxers.
This tank top was something he just pulled out.
When Qin Zui suddenly asked for a video call, he felt awkward being shirtless in bed, like he was up to something.
“Cold.” Jiang Chu didn’t want to admit the real reason, so he made up an excuse. “It’s almost December. You think it’s still summer?”
“What about down there,” Qin Zui asked, “did you put something on too?”
“Is there something you want from this video call or not?” Jiang Chu choked up a bit, not knowing what to say to him.
Even though when they slept together, Jiang Chu was just in his boxers, and Qin Zui had said and done much more shameless things.
But doing it over a video call had a whole different level of embarrassment.
Jiang Chu couldn’t even understand how Qin Zui could so calmly stare at him and ask those questions.
“Are you hard yet, bro?” Qin Zui dropped another one.
“Fuck.” Jiang Chu’s scalp tingled. He glared at Qin Zui. “Are you having a seizure or what?”
“Pull the blanket open.” Qin Zui got up holding his phone, climbed the ladder to his bed, and lay down.
Jiang Chu heard the faint rustle of fabric from his side and guessed what Qin Zui was doing. A rush of hot air slammed into the back of his head. He wanted to reach through the video and punch him, but there was also a surge of uncontrollable excitement.
“Pull your grandpa’s blanket. I’m hanging up.” Jiang Chu gritted his back teeth and bent one of his legs under the covers.
“Don’t hang up, bro.” Qin Zui turned on his side to face the wall, half his face buried in the pillow. The aggression in his gaze was somewhat veiled, and even his voice was lowered. “Stay with me for a while.”
Stay with you doing what?!
Jiang Chu was burning all over. Even in the most passionate stages of his past relationships, he’d never done anything like this!
“Can you have some shame for once in your life!” Jiang Chu was clearly lying comfortably alone in his own home, but Qin Zui had him unconsciously lowering his voice too, as if afraid of drawing someone’s attention. “Aren’t you afraid your roommate might come back?”
Qin Zui let out a low laugh from his nose.
“That’s why I’m telling you to pull the blanket open. Help me finish faster.” His voice had changed, lazy, rough, and heavy.
Jiang Chu couldn’t keep video chatting with him. His ears were burning all the way to his temples. He wanted to just throw his phone aside and let Qin Zui play by himself, talking to the air.
But after thinking for a long time, he still held onto the phone tightly, not moving.
“Are you touching yourself, bro?” Qin Zui’s breathing rushed against the earpiece. “Talk to me.”
“Not everyone’s brain is full of that one thought, like you.” Jiang Chu frowned and switched which leg was bent.
“When was the last time? Last night?” Qin Zui asked again.
It was the night before last, before sleeping.
Jiang Chu couldn’t help but be drawn into the memory by him, feeling his own breathing quicken.
“Shut up and hurry up.” He irritably reached for a cigarette from the headboard. “My phone’s about to die.”
“Talk to me, bro.” Qin Zui stared at his Adam’s apple sliding as he tilted his head to light the cigarette.
“Want me to just put on a porno for you?” Jiang Chu really had nothing to say to him.
When Qin Zui was in heat, he was a fucking mad dog.
“No.” He refused very quickly, with a hint of a smile at the end of his voice. “Let me watch you. Or do you want to watch me?”
Jiang Chu, unable to take it anymore, threw his phone aside.
“Bro.” Qin Zui’s voice became even more responsive, a muffled, heavy breath escaping him.
Jiang Chu squeezed his eyes shut, feeling his brain sloshing around in circles.
“Talk to me, bro.” Qin Zui’s breathing rhythm was hoarse and fast.
“I have nothing to say to you.” Jiang Chu moved his hand, reaching down from the edge of the blanket.
“Say you miss me.” Qin Zui said.
Jiang Chu didn’t speak. His waist tightened, and his bent leg straightened, pressing against the sheet.
“I miss you.” Qin Zui said again.
“…I know.” Jiang Chu’s voice was hoarse as he replied.
“I want to bite you, bro.” By the end, Qin Zui’s words were completely unrestrained.
His movements were completely undisguised. Jiang Chu could almost imagine the speed of his wrist along with the rhythm of Qin Zui’s breathing.
He said a whole string of different things he “wanted” in a hoarse voice. Jiang Chu listened, his face tingling. He could feel his phone getting hot even through the blanket, like it was about to explode from sheer embarrassment.
As a long, relaxed breath came from Qin Zui’s end, Jiang Chu’s phone finally died, letting out a single “vibration” as it shut itself off automatically.
“Shutting off” felt like a command lifting a ban at that moment.
Jiang Chu’s chest rose and fell once. He let out a heavy sigh, then suddenly flipped over, pressing his fist against his forehead. He buried his face face-down into the pillow, eyes closed.
Qin Zui’s “I wants” were still looping through his mind, each one more shameless than the last, bringing up all kinds of images that made him want to get angry, and then the opposite images.
At the end of those “wants”, Jiang Chu bit down hard on his own wrist, as if he couldn’t bear the weight of the blanket anymore. He slammed heavily down, his toes curling and going numb against the sheet.
