Chapter 86: Xiangxiang—!

This little pinky toe was far too lively. Chen Ji nearly lost his composure. With a sudden “pfft,” he burst into laughter. He pulled Second Master Huang into his arms and planted several fierce kisses on its head—smack, smack, smack—the sounds running together into one continuous noise. Second Master Huang twisted aside. 【Hey! Chen Ji! What are you doing! Let me go!】

【Have you kissed enough yet? Let go! Who kisses like that!】

Chen Ji took a deep inhale on Second Master Huang’s milk-tea-colored little belly before finally releasing Second Grandpa. With a hawk-like somersault, Second Grandpa vaulted onto the windowsill. He glanced down at the disheveled fur on his belly and grumbled. 【Do you have to get so mushy! Shoo! Shoo!】

With that, he flipped right up onto the eaves, ensuring Chen Ji couldn’t grab him.

The Red-Furred Fox fidgeted eagerly at Chen Ji’s side. Chen Ji seized one of its legs and yanked it into his lap. As he leaned in for a smooch, he caught a whiff of the Red-Furred Fox’s musky stench. He shoved it away in disgust. The Red-Furred Fox let out a pitiful whine. Chen Ji sniffed his own arm and confirmed the odor had rubbed off onto his clothes. “No way, you stink.”

The Red-Furred Fox drooped its head in misery. Amused, Chen Ji hoisted it onto his shoulder and hauled it into the bathroom for a vigorous scrubbing. The System Cat watched the Red-Furred Fox saunter in all coquettish-like, only for screams to erupt from within moments later. Half an hour passed before the Red-Furred Fox emerged, looking like a drowned rat. Its gaze was utterly bewildered and baffled, as if it still couldn’t comprehend what had just befallen it.

The System Cat rolled on the bed in hysterics. Whenever Chen Ji got in a mood, he felt the urge to wash things—and foolishly, they always cozied up for pets. Served it right.

Towel draped over his head, Chen Ji emerged. The System Cat assumed he was done. 【A few of those herbs are pricey. I’ve already shopped around online for the best deals… the kind we can’t forage on the mountain.】

Daoist Qingjing had just forwarded the prescription his master ancestor had written for Chen Ji. The System Cat had gotten right to work collecting them. True, it couldn’t help Chen Ji directly, but they could game the system! It knew exactly which herbs weren’t available on the mountain and couldn’t tell him outright. But placing the order itself? That skipped the problem entirely!

If questioned, they were for its own use. Bought with the host’s money—what was the harm in him sharing a bite or two? Perfectly legal!

Rubbing his damp hair, Chen Ji scooped up the System Cat and dragged it into his embrace. It let out a startled “gah” before being hauled into the bathroom. The door slammed shut amid the echoes of its wails. “Meow-ow—!”

【Chen Ji, are you nuts? I’m not a real cat—why the hell are you washing me—!】

【Aaaah! Let go! I don’t want a bath—!】

【Chen Ji, let go! Let me go!】

Roughly an hour later, Chen Ji flopped onto the bed, refreshed yet exhausted, and passed out in seconds. The System Cat perched inside the dryer, staring down the now-freed Red-Furred Fox. It flashed the System Cat a taunting grin before leaping lightly onto the bed. There, at Chen Ji’s feet, it stretched out with elegant grace.

In the next instant, Chen Ji’s leg flicked up the blanket, rolling the Red-Furred Fox right inside. Before it could react, it was tugged into Chen Ji’s arms. Chen Ji even tucked in its neck fur, resting his head atop its own as he mumbled, “Go to sleep already. No more fussing…”

The Red-Furred Fox powered down against Chen Ji’s sweet, fragrant warmth. The System Cat kicked open the dryer door, smacked the machine off, and bounded onto the bed. Chen Ji promptly released the Red-Furred Fox, rolled over, and pulled the System Cat into his embrace.

The Red-Furred Fox jerked its head up warily. There was the System Cat, pillowed on Chen Ji’s arm. It swept a scornful glance over the Red-Furred Fox before nuzzling deeper into Chen Ji’s chest and burying its head.

Fuming, the Red-Furred Fox’s eyes bulged. It yearned to end the System Cat right then but feared waking Chen Ji—and getting barred from the room forever. It bashed its head against the pillow twice before burrowing underneath. No way was it leaving the bed!

Sadly, the days grew hotter by the hour. Chen Ji woke in the dead of night, his front and back smothered in fluffy fur. He’d sweated himself awake, skin sticking wherever the pelts pressed.

He shoved both the System Cat and the Red-Furred Fox to the foot of the bed, then sprawled out in blissful solitude.

The next morning, a barrage of shrill yowls jolted Chen Ji awake. Thinking disaster had struck, he shot upright. The Red-Furred Fox was hot on the System Cat’s tail, nipping viciously. As a demon, the Red-Furred Fox had the edge; unwilling to reveal itself, the System Cat could only dodge desperately amid the chaos. The Red-Furred Fox pursued with frenzied cries, utterly berserk.

The room lay in shambles from their rampage.

【Chen Ji! Stop this Red Fur! It’s lost its mind!】 the System Cat roared.

No need for Chen Ji to rise; the System Cat dove straight into his arms. The Red-Furred Fox softened mid-pounce at the sight of him, dissolving into aggrieved whimpers. Holding the System Cat close, Chen Ji asked, “What happened? Why are you two fighting?”

The Red-Furred Fox kept up its pitiful mewls. The System Cat tattled at once. “Meow meow meow!”

【I have no idea! This Red Fur went psycho out of nowhere. I was sleeping like a rock when it bit me. Scared the hell out of me—I bolted. Lord, I need rabies shots! Gotta get ’em!】

【Chen Ji, I bet it’s got rabies. Boot it out!】

【Or just put it down humanely!】 The System Cat bellowed at top volume. 【It’s sick for sure! I didn’t do a damn thing to it—it just bit me!】

Chen Ji: “……?”

Scooping up the System Cat in one hand, Chen Ji strode to the window and flung it open. “Second Grandpa? You there?!”

Second Master Huang dangled his head upside down from the eaves. 【What?】

Chen Ji explained the situation. Second Master Huang hopped inside, listened to the Red-Furred Fox’s stream of whimpers, then translated for Chen Ji. 【Oh, Red Fur says it woke up snuggled against Fat Cat. Fat Cat even licked its head. Felt like the ultimate insult—wanted to rip Fat Cat apart.】

Chen Ji: “……?”

Turning back, Chen Ji ruffled the Red-Furred Fox’s head. It whimpered while pressing into his palm, surely lodging its complaint. Chen Ji patted its neck, gripped its scruff, hoisted it up, and deposited it outside the window. “Go sleep out there.”

The Red-Furred Fox: “Whine……?!”

Chen Ji patted its head one last time and shut the window without mercy. Second Master Huang tsked and retreated to the eaves, giving Red Fur a parting kick. 【Useless mutt. Can’t even win at pet politics. What a waste of fur!】

Head low, the Red-Furred Fox sobbed piteously.

The System Cat’s ire finally ebbed. Lounging on Chen Ji’s back, it grumbled. 【Rabies for sure! Trust me, Chen Ji. Euthanize it tomorrow!】

Chen Ji eyed the clock: five in the morning, the sky already paling. One look at the trashed room chased off any lingering drowsiness. Resigned, he set about cleaning. He should’ve booted the Red-Furred Fox after its bath yesterday—no mess today then.

Xiangxiang was the best, though. Xiangxiang never got jealous of Xiao Ba. Never picked fights with Xiao Ba, either.

Chen Ji righted the toppled clothes rack. The dropped garments, trampled beyond salvage, went straight into the laundry hamper. As for the jumble of small odds and ends, he couldn’t make them out well—might as well pile them haphazardly on the table for later sorting.

Once he’d tidied up sufficiently, Chen Ji noticed something amiss. Dawn had barely broken; the room shouldn’t feel this illuminated to him. He ought to be squinting in the gloom, yet everything stood out crisp and clear.

Chen Ji scanned the room carefully. At last, he traced the glow—those intensely bright lines—to under the bed. Lifting the sheet revealed a jade jue lying there.

It gleamed vividly: full, opulent, lustrous. Even with his poor vision, Chen Ji could sense its warm radiance. He stared for a moment, then recalled what it was. Daoist Qingjing had brought it to him earlier that day. He’d stuffed it in his pocket and clean forgot about it when changing after dinner.

Likely, the Red-Furred Fox and System Cat’s chase had knocked over the hamper, sending the jade jue tumbling under the bed.

Chen Ji sank to the floor right there and took the jade jue in hand.

No other reason—it simply felt soothing. Tranquilizing, even. He couldn’t pinpoint why. It seemed to block out all surrounding clamor and din, though that was mere illusion; other sounds persisted.

He let it slip from his grasp, and the cacophony rushed back.

Clutching it once more… perhaps it didn’t shield sound at all. Something else?

Like perception.

A smile curved Chen Ji’s lips. He gave the System Cat’s head a rub. By then it was six o’clock. He headed to the bathroom for a fresh rinse, slipped the jade jue into the pocket of clean clothes, loaded all the dirties into the washer, and turned to making breakfast.

Cooking three squares a day as a blind man was no small chore.

Breakfast done, he made his offering to the Mountain Lord. As usual, Chen Ji shouldered his foraging basket and headed out. Yesterday he’d begged the Mountain Lord for those herbs—and reiterated the plan during today’s tribute. Fingers crossed for a good haul.

He exited the Mountain Lord Temple and entered the mountaintop woods, hanging the jade jue around his neck.

The System Cat: 【This thing actually work?】

Chen Ji: 【We’ll find out.】

Chen Ji foraged through the forest. Everything appeared far sharper than before. Foliage had once blurred into vague shapes; now it resolved into clean lines. He pinpointed Fifth Grandpa—the Five-Step Snake—lounging fifty meters ahead. Farther out glowed a blaze of potent white light… like a disco spotlight sweeping the entire woods.

He laid out some spicy hot pot and a king-cup milk tea for Fifth Grandpa, then happily trekked toward the beacon.

The nearer he drew, the crisper his vision grew. It was as if the world bathed in mellow sunlight.

A massive White Tiger lounged in a nest of withered grass and branches, tail swaying lazily in sleep. Chen Ji approached. The White Tiger’s ears twitched sharply. As it swung its head around, Chen Ji lunged. The White Tiger surged upright, pinning him beneath its bulk.

Chen Ji: “……Hiss.”

Tiger claws could really kill a man. With a single swipe to the chest, was Xiangxiang trying to kill him?